Fri | Sep 21, 2018

You Make Me Better

Published:Monday | June 1, 2015 | 12:00 AMJody-Anne Lawrence

Finding someone who touches your very soul and makes you want to be better not only for yourself but for them, so that you can move them the way they elevate you daily. Flair asked a few couples how marriage has made them better.

Marriage helped me to trust, it helped me to share things that I was not able to before. My outlook on life in general has changed, I have become more patient. I have become a new man spiritually, socially, career-wise and even with more awareness because of my loving wife.

- Fernandez Barrett

I'm more considerate - I am the last child (of four boys) for my parents. The brother who I followed is nine years older than I am. I was, most times, alone and was always getting my way. Over time, that helped me become a bit selfish because I never had to think of others or their feelings, and I tended to live my life thinking about me and me only. This attitude followed me through both my high school and college years. I have known my wife since I was about five or six. When Terrianna and I decided to get married, that was when things started to change and I realised I had to consider her feelings and input in my everyday life. I also have more compassion - I know I am still young with this married life, but I believe I understand it better than when I was a single person. It is true what they say "when you are married, all the I's turn into WE's". As we started to have talks about how we will raise our family, God's willing, I understand more now how many choices and sacrifices families make.

- Wamil Kendall

It elevated my thinking. When I came into the union for myself, I realised there is more to life than just making myself happy. I realised how happy I could be to make someone else happy. It showed me that putting someone else's interest before my own made me happy. Also growing up in a house where my mother did almost everything for me, marriage taught me how to be "the man of the house". She taught me how to cook and clean making me more independent and self sufficient. Finally marriage made me healthier. You know after a while when you are older and mom stops taking care of you like she used to, you do not eat as you should or take care of yourself as you should. So I was frequently getting ill and I did not know why. As soon as I got married, my wife took care of that and I don't have that problem anymore.

- Daive Richards

I think marriage made me worry less - it makes you realise you have someone who, no matter what, will always be on your side, in your corner and to take care of you.

It's also taught me that I don't need to be selfish, his needs are just as (or more) important than mine and I'm happiest when he's happy.

- Krystalle Sheil

Marriage taught me patience and how to communicate and express myself without anger. It also taught me how to love someone more than myself.

- Stefan Davidson

Before marriage, I was a very insular person. I would not say selfish, but I would usually be thinking about how things affected me only. Now that I'm married, I'm better at understanding others, because I have to think about Omar as well as myself. I think about how my actions affect him, and our family, and it makes me better able to have empathy. I can put myself in others' shoes easier.

- Jolyn Bryan

The main thing that marriage has taught me is patience. And this has made me a better person, in that, I have learnt how to be more understanding and open-minded. All of this came with time and I am still learning everyday. After all, the goal isn't just to get married, but to stay married.

- Melissa Gray

Marriage has made me a true team player. I'm invested in everything my husband does, so I am always working to make him better and to make us better as a unit as opposed to just self-improvement. It also allows me to constantly self-evaluate. My philosophy for marriage is 'everything on the table', including all faults and shortcomings. Seeing how these faults affect another person on a daily basis really calls for continuous introspection and change. I'm a better woman everyday because I'm married.

- Kamille Adair-Morgan