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Princess Diaries: Fit as fiddles - aquaareobics

Published:Monday | July 20, 2015 | 7:00 AM

Are you struggling in a relationship and not fulfilled, because you or your spouse keep saying everything that comes to mind? Or are you longing to get back in good grace with someone and it's taking longer than you would like?

Flair's Love Corner will explore, over the next few weeks, passive strategies that can possibly save heartache and mend broken relationships.

This week's Love Corner will feature the first and most important characteristics of love - patience.

Love is Patient

Patience can be defined as what you do while you wait for someone or something. Being patient is more than biting your lips, clapping a hand over your mouth. Patience is a deep breath. It is a choice to control your emotions and show discretion.

Patience includes responding in a positive way to a negative situation, being slow to anger and have a long fuse instead of a quick temper.

Patience also brings an internal calm during an external storm. No one likes to be around an impatient person because it causes them to overreact.

Patience doesn't rush to judge but listens to what the other person is saying. Patience stands in the doorway where anger is clawing to burst in.

If your spouse offends you, do you quickly retaliate or stay under control? Do you find that anger is your emotional default when treated unfairly? If so, you are spreading poison rather than medicine.

Patience helps you give your spouse permission to be human. It understands that everyone fails. When a mistake is made it chooses to give them more time than they deserve to correct it. It gives you the ability to hold on during the tough times in your relationship rather than bailing out under the pressure.

Can your spouse count on having a patient partner? Can he or she know that locking his or her keys in the car will be met by your understanding rather than a demeaning lecture that makes him or her feel like a child?

cathy.risden@gleanerjm.com