This selfie business is getting out of hand
I might be on the older side of 30, but I get how the world is now - doesn't mean I like it.
A friend of mine posted something on 'Fassbook' the other day (and then I subsequently saw the story in The Telegraph), that more people had died taking selfies than from shark attacks in 2015 (up to August).
Now the cynic in me is going to say maybe the sharks don't like the taste of human flesh all that much. Maybe they prefer a nice piece of herring, tuna, or flounder. But the fact that people are even dying at all from their selfie action is quite disturbing. Like I said, I get it - we live in a very cosmetic, glamorous world now. Everybody is a star and everybody has the right to feel that way.
But things are getting too drastic now. People are taking selfies on top of bridges and buildings they are not supposed to have access to in the first place. They are taking them while doing other activities like rollerblading, skateboarding, skydiving, and even running with the bulls. If one a dem bull deh eva ketch yuh ... oh wait! That actually did happen to a guy didn't it? All right, never mind. But people are even taking selfies with sharks. Suppose Jaws decide seh him hungry? Dog, er, shark nyam yuh suppa! Wild animals are wild, regardless of whether they are getting the paparazzi treatment or not.
And cellphone companies don't make things any easier by deliberately making phones where the front cameras, aka the selfie cameras, have better features, so the owners can take better pictures - of themselves being idle. When you log on to Fassbook and Instagram, all you can see are pictures of people staring into dem camera mawning! Now, don't get me wrong. I've taken a selfie or two as well. After nuhbaddy nuh betta dan me! But I don't do it while on top of a train, where I can get electrocuted (one man actually died that way). Most of them have died from falls. High seat kill Ms Thomas puss indeed!
The latest death (to our knowledge) was the Japanese man who fell down some steps at the Taj Mahal in India. Now the distance between both countries is somewhere in the region of nearly 6,000 kilometres. So him travel so far fi dead so? Man born fi heng, can't drown! But the question with dying due to a selfie, has to be "for what?" You gone to the Great Beyond because you lost your grip taking a picture of yourself? You probably didn't even get to upload it before your life was downloaded. It just defies common sense. No doubt the causes of it are vanity (self-explanatory) but also competition. Every selfie taker is trying to top everyone else, so the more extreme the better.
This selfie thing needs to be curbed. Fortunately Jamaicans haven't got too extreme. Yet. But you know we falla fashin already. Smaddy soon tumble dung from Blue Mountain Peak. You just wait.
• Take a selfie with me, safely, at email@example.com.