Mon | Dec 10, 2018

Kelly's World: Nurse! Mi nuh feel good

Published:Monday | January 25, 2016 | 12:00 AM

With the start to the year that we've had, I think I understand why someone can become a hypochondriac.

The Zika Virus has well and truly established itself in the Caribbean region, and that more than likely will mean Jamaicans will get it. When chik-V came along, it felt like everyone was catching it. Even had a bout of it myself.

But the 'chicken gunman' sounds like a boy with a slingshot compared to its cousin. Imagine the Ministry of Health telling women to hold off on pregnancy. Fuss mi a hear dat! Didn't know that was even legal. I totally understand and support the directive, though, because let's face it, nobody wants a baby to be born with complications because of the virus. I mean, pregnancy is a tricky thing even without external forces like the Zika Virus.

Heard a man call in to a radio programme, saying that the whole virus and everything associated with it, is just another method of the 'powers at work behind the scenes' to get rid of the black population. Now there have been some nefarious schemes throughout history to do away with people of a certain group. Not sure if I'm going that way with this one.

But seriously, how can you not get paranoid at all these diseases and viruses that we've been hearing about over the last few years? It seems like every year there's a 'new' one. Remember Bird Flu? Remember the flesh-eating bacteria thing? SARS was another one. The Ebola scare last year? Trust me, if you follow this situation, you will walk around in a hazmat suit for the rest of your life.




Late in 2015, my sinusitis decided to go overboard on me again. Decided I was not going to take any antibiotics (my doctor is tired of talking to me anyway). So I sniffed saltwater through my nostrils. Hurt like hell, but it apparently worked. However, I used some drops of hot water in the process. Then I remembered about a brain-eating bacteria that lives in warm water. Look yah nuh man, mi start fret same time. Mi head immediately start hurt me. Start think 'bout all a di tings mi nuh do, all the people mi need fi say sorry to ... mi tun idiot!

However, based on my reading, if I was going to die from it, I wouldn't be writing this. So we dodged that one. But trust me, many persons are either going to become clean freaks, or they're going to worry to death. It seems like we're hearing a new pestilence every week. God (and the doctors) help we.

Tell me if you're feeling any symptoms at