Wed | Sep 20, 2017

She was wrong all along

Published:Monday | October 31, 2016 | 10:00 AMKrysta Anderson

Fellas, you know how they say, to know her is to love her? Well, what happens when while meeting a girl, you're greeted by that bad feeling? Then, you decide to give her the benefit of the doubt, but as time goes on, she just adds insult to injury? Then she'd probably be only confirming your initial belief that she was wrong all along.

Meet 31-year-old Mark Ross*. Ross, an entrepreneur found himself in a tangled web when he met 32-year-old therapist, Fay Wright*. He knew from the get go that something was a little wrong with Wright but he somehow went along with it. A first strike for him: her approach.

Ross and Wright met at a get-together and Wright, who appeared interested in Ross, sent a message to him through their mutual friend, professing her attraction towards him.

The alpha male had now become the prey.

Intrigued by the role reversal, he decided to explore the possibility and made his way over to her table. "When I went over, she started playing hard to get. For instance, she wanted to dance but instead of asking me, she tried forcing my hand in asking her. The conversation was stiff and forced. It all became too confusing for a first encounter," he explained to the Flair.

THEFIRSTSIGN

So when she announced she was leaving early, he took that as a sign, let out a sigh of relief and returned to the festivities. Only to hear that she was in the parking lot waiting for him. "When I got out there, she asked me if I wasn't going to take her number. So we exchanged, for peace of mind, and so begun the series of "Why did I ever decide to date Fay Wright?" he said, riddled with despair by the memory.

The two 'lovebirds' exchanged words via chat, but Ross confessed that he was thrown off by their conversation, "Right off the bat, she started asking me about my job, my five-year plan, anything work-related. It was hard to get a word in, so I just didn't bother to. She got the hint, but tried reverse psychology to see if I would come around. No such luck on her part," he said. So, they had gone their separate ways. Or so he thought. A year later would prove otherwise.

"I sent out an e-blast to everyone in my contacts about my website, not remembering that she was there. She responded to the email, wondering if that was meant for her, or just a forward," he said. Time had passed and he was at a different place, but Wright remained set in her pursuit. She managed to weasel herself into a first date and offered to pick him up. "When she reached the house, I saw her get out of the car. I thought she was coming in for a hug but instead she went to the passenger's side and had a seat. I asked what was up, and she told me to drive." Ross found it strange that this woman who barely knew him was instructing him to drive her car. The date, he described as a visit to 'Dullsville', included her talking about work, and finding out more about his plans.

As time slowly moved on, she grew jealous and possessive,. "She wanted to call all the shots, and because she was always so busy with work, the relationship or courtship would be on her terms. She was a little too controlling for my liking, but she meant well, and came from a sincere place, so I remained positive."

MINDGAMES

Until, he pointed out, that she started playing mind games. "She tried to get me to say I love her about two weeks into our dating: I would not lie about how I felt, and asked that she give me time to figure out my feelings. She then got mad about me not wanting her. Getting upset and taking it out on me had a new low for her." He continued, "She wanted to make a man feel like the man, without him actually being a man. So he had to drive the car, carry her shopping, accompany her to events: it didn't matter he was the one spending or even making the money. As long she got to have her arm candy by her side, she was good.

Then there were obvious reasons for his 'unattraction', he said, "She was brilliant, but lacked personality, so it was hard for us to relate to each other. She was unkempt and kept her place untidy. I am a germophobe so I just could not stand for that. She claimed to be a Christian, and I respected her wishes, after all, I was getting to know her, but then she would do everything in her power to get the ball rolling in the lovemaking department and then turn it around on me when I did nothing with her advances, that I didn't want her. The sex, when we did have it, wasn't great either. So why was I even trying?"

But the straw which broke the camel's back was one day, when she accompanied him to go house hunting, she threw a jealous tantrum over the possible landlord, a female, and she warned him to not drive her car the way he was. He brought the vehicle to a screeching halt and stepped out of it to continue his search alone. "After another incident in her home, soon after, her semi-apology included that in all her case studies, the man is always wrong, so that's what we were all along: a case study. Longest and worst two months of my life!"

*Names changed upon request

krysta.anderson@gleanerjm.com