Sun | Dec 16, 2018

Kelly's World | Making molehills since, well, always

Published:Monday | September 24, 2018 | 12:00 AM

Let's get something out of the way very quickly, I'm a drama queen (or is it king?).

I am an undoubted and unapologetic maker of mountains, using molehills as my base material.

If you Google the term 'making mountains out of molehills', you may actually see my picture.

The first time I got a flat tyre I nearly needed a straitjacket.

The first time I dinged the car I wailed like a man who just got back the DNA test results and didn't like what he saw.

Bottom line, I don't take adversity in any form very well.

The problem with having a molehill mentality is that sometimes you're absolutely right about a particular problem being bigger than the rest of the world thinks.

Now to be fair, it may not be Mt Everest, it's just not a smooth lawn.

The definition of chaos theory, at least how I understand it, is that even a small change in the flow of something can have disastrous effects.

Practical (and actual) example for me. I was advised to crack my windows just a bit, because if too much heat builds up in the car, it might cause the glass to break.

Considering I don't like changing tyres, there was no way I was looking forward to replacing glass. So one day I left the windows down ever so slightly.

Problem is because I'm not used to doing that, when I got home that night I forgot the back windows weren't rolled all the way up.

So of course it rained that night. You can figure the rest. To be fair, it wasn't like the repeat of The Titanic. But still annoying, as you can imagine.

Now, if I had not followed the 'sage' advice bestowed on me, I would have had a completely dry interior.

 

STOWAWAY INSECT?

 

Now for me, that wasn't Mount Kilimanjaro, but it wasn't just a sloped driveway either.

The pessimist in me 'rationalised' that some insect could have also crawled into the car and decide to show itself at a rather inopportune time once I started driving. Hey, it happens!

The thing with molehills however, at least according to Wikipedia, is that the "disturbance of the soil brings an important benefit by aerating and tilling it, adding to its fertility. Molehills are therefore sometimes used as a source of good soil for use in gardening and are particularly valued by some practitioners of permaculture for fine potting soil."

So molehills (real or figurative) can actually be good things?

I have to grudgingly agree. While some of the things that I have magnified beyond their actual effect still irk me, they no longer have me screaming like Job when his house crumbled.

However, the same Wikipedia article notes "(molehills) may cause damage to gardens and functional areas of grass such as pasture land, and they represent a minor safety hazard". Same ting!

But whatever you're making your mountains out of, just don't let your blood pressure get too high.

That will move you from the mountain top to the bottom of the pile really quickly. Later

Link me at daviot.kelly@gleanerjm.com