I feel di pain inna mi belly bottom, mom cries
In 2000, Nadine Campbell's sister was raped and killed. Then, it was the most traumatic experience for her. Until last December.
On December 14 in Ocho Rios, right before her eyes, her "pride and joy", her 20-year-old daughter, Alisa Carey, was attacked and stabbed to death by her estranged boyfriend.
Witnessing the attack and then having to travel beside her lifeless body in the back of a police pickup to the hospital are pictures that will forever be etched on Campbell's mind.
And it seems like the pain will never go away.
"Lord Jesus! It come een like mi just have one baby. Mi feel di pain inna mi belly bottom ... (it's like) when yuh just give birth to a baby and yuh feel yuh womb a cum up back when you just start breastfeed yuh baby," Campbell said as she tried to explain her feelings less than eight weeks after the incident.
She continued, tears welling: "Every time mi lock mi eye, mi si mi baby a gasp. Mi see when him stab har; mi si when she drop a grung. It cum een like mi world ova an' mi nuh know who fi jus ... mi cyaa sleep a night. Mi miserable. Mi ignorant."
"But the thought of me being there when dat bwoy stab mi daughter show yuh how heartless him be," she continued. "Him nuh have no regard for me. Him nuh have it fi nobody; no mercy him nuh have. An' mi a tell yuh, man, if a nuh fi God an' prayer an' mi family, mi would a mad or dead, or suppm, because ... a nuh mi only child, but a mi pride, mi joy, mi baby, mi fren, mi sista. Lisa a everything to me."
Campbell said that as she cried for help, people gathered around and started taking pictures with their cell phones.
It's rough. Only God can take away the stress, says grandma
Nadine Campbell's mother, Laney McFarlane, is also grieving for her granddaughter.
"Rough!" she replied when asked how life has been since Alisa's death.
"It has been the roughest ever because mi cyaa sleep, mi eat minimum, and is just not the same without Lisa in the house," she added, sighing heavily.
Alisa was one of the bright sparks in the house, she shared.
She struggled to find words to continue, and when she finally did, she said: "A di hardest thing fi explain because it come een like piece a me, piece a everybody, gone. The children are more miserable. They want their aunty Lisa, dem sister."
"Even as a Christian me haffi say the truth: my prayer life is not where it supposed to be; mi worship life not where it supposed to be. I'm trying, but only God can tek away di stress from mi," McFarlane commented.
... 'Change the law! Hang them!'
Nadine Campbell, in the meantime, is planning to focus her energy on helping other women by advocating against violence against women.
"Definitely, because I'm a woman," she asserted when questioned about it. "I've been there already. Thank God mi live fi tell di tale."
Alleging that she was abused by Lisa's father, she decided to leave him when her daughter was two years old.
"Mi naw mek my pickney dem see man a hurt mi, a batter-bruise mi, cut me up. Man nuh fi lick woman!"
Campbell added: "As soon as mi put mi baby to rest an' mi mind start get calmer, where mi can sit down round one computer, everything it takes, I'm going to advocate against violence against women. If I can even form a group.
"We need to change the law. When a woman reports that somebody threatens or abuses her, from that person reach the station, you should carry them to do counselling or something. Yuh can't let them out back. Threat is serious.
"How can you let me out if I say I'm going to kill somebody? A when me kill the person yuh a go lock me up? It's too late then. A life is already gone.
"Wi haffi change the law; fi hang dem when dem dweet. Dem a gwaan too bad! Yu wasting taxpayers' money; yu feeding dem. Dem have time fi laugh and drink while the parents and families are in pain. I'm in pain. Pain, pain, pain! Mi cyaa laugh; mi cyaa happy!"