Fri | Jan 18, 2019

DOCTOR'S ADVICE - I don't like oral sex

Published:Saturday | October 25, 2014 | 12:00 AM

Q I am a guy of 18, Doc, and last week I was given oral sex for the very first time. To my astonishment, I did not like it very much! The girl was quite upset by the fact that I asked her to stop. But it was paining me a little. Am I abnormal?

A: People tend to talk about fellatio (which means oral sex performed on a man) as a truly wonderful experience. But in actual fact, it is not everybody's cup of tea! You may be surprised to learn that a lot of girls do not like doing it. Some of them find that it makes them feel rather sick.

And as for guys ... well, many of them find that the sensations caused from the female's mouth are nowhere near as intense as those which are created by the vagina. Also, there is the question of the young lady's teeth. If they are sharp, then fellatio can be very painful for the male.

So you are not abnormal. And you have no need to fret. It may be that at some time in the future you will find a lady who is really skilled in fellatio, and who knows how to make it intensely pleasurable for you. But until then, you would be perfectly justified in giving it a miss.

Q: Please help me, Doc. I have a bad pain in the testicle, and I do not know what to do. I am embarrassed. I have a girlfriend who is a nurse, and she thinks I must have a sickness called 'EPI-something'. Because of that, she is refusing to go to bed with me. The trouble started around two weeks ago after I had been on a visit to Kingston. While I was there, I met a pretty girl in a bar. We got talking, and after a little while she took me home and we had sex. I think she must have been a sort of 'professional', Doc, because afterwards she asked me for money. And I gave her some. A few days later, I started to get an ache in my right testicle, or maybe next to it. It did not hurt much to begin with, but now it pains me a lot! I am finding it impossible to study. And I think it is getting worse. What is wrong with me, Doc?

A: I guess your nursing friend is probably right. And it is very wise of her to refuse to go to bed with you. Frankly, I am surprised that you can even consider sex while you have this amount of pain!

What the nurse has been telling you is that you probably have a condition called 'epididymitis'. (eppy-DID-ee-MIGHT-iss). Epididymitis is common in young men, especially if they have been sleeping around. It is an inflammation of a small part of the body called the epididymis, which is located right next to the testicle.

This inflammation is caused from germs. These germs enter the guy's penis during sex and find their way downwards through the piping until they reach the epididymis. There they set up an inflammation. This is intensely painful, as you have discovered. It also causes swelling of the scrotum.

The germs which create this painful inflammation are usually either chlamydia, or else the type that cause gonorrhoea ('the clap'). But other germs can do it too. What is certain is that you must get this infection treated right away. Otherwise, you could get sick - and you might become infertile (sterile).

If you go to a doc, he will examine you and confirm the diagnosis. He will give you a course of antibiotics, which you must complete. Be of good cheer: you will be cured. But you definitely must not have sex until the doctor tells you that it is safe to do so. Finally, I suppose you have no way of contacting the young lady who you encountered in the Corporate Area? Ideally, she should be told that she is probably carrying an infection - and needs treatment.

Q: I cannot understand why I have just started to get severe period pain at the age of 17. My menses started when I was 13, Doc, and during the past four years, I have had no trouble at all. But now I have intense pain every month, which stops me from working or studying. Why?

A: When teenage girls start to menstruate, they often have no pain at all. This is because they have not yet begun to ovulate - that is, release an ovum (egg) each month. But after a little while, they start ovulating. And from then on they may well get menstrual pain (which is called dysmenorrhoea).

Your case is unusual, in that you did not start getting bellyache until you reached 17. My guess is that between the ages of 13 and 17, you were probably not ovulating. Anyway, what you should do now is to consult a doctor and let her examine you internally. She will probably find that there is no physical disease present. And she will then give you medication that will take the pain away.

Q: My Doc wants me to take 'the Shot'. But how long does it last? And is it 100 per cent effective?

A: The Shot (the Jab) is indeed almost 100 per cent effective in protecting women against pregnancy. But its efficacy only lasts for about three months. So you would need to have the next injection within about 12 weeks after the first one. If you are late in getting the next 'shot', you could easily become pregnant.

Email questions to Doc at and read more in the 'Outlook Magazine' tomorrow.