Sat | Sep 23, 2017

Pregnant for my friend’s husband

Published:Saturday | November 14, 2015 | 11:00 AM

Dear Joan,

I am crying my eyes out day and night because of a situation I am in. I am currently three months' pregnant for my friend's husband and I don't know what to do.

We both attend the same church and I really didn't mean for this to happen. We went to a gospel show. My friend (his wife) was supposed to come, too, but she wasn't feeling well, so she told us to go ahead and have fun. After the concert, he dropped me home and I invited him in for a drink.

We were just talking and laughing and

sharing some humorous conversation. He was seated close to me. One minute we were laughing together and the next we were kissing. Something told me to stop, but honestly, it

was as if I couldn't stop myself. We ended up making love.

We were both horrified afterwards. I promised him I would never say anything to his wife, but I have now found out that I am pregnant. I don't have a boyfriend, so I can't even pin this on him. I told him about the pregnancy and he advised me to abort it. Joan, I don't want to do that as I am not sure I will ever have another. I don't want to cause problems in their marriage, but I don't think I can abort this baby either.

- W.T.

Dear W.T.,

You should have thought about not wanting to cause problems in your friend's marriage before sleeping with her husband. I am sorry for coming down so hard on you, but you were sending signals to her husband when you invited him in. She trusted you to go to the concert with her husband. Added to that, she was not feeling well. As a friend, you should have been eager to see to it that her husband got home right after the concert. You both did her wrong. Her husband is trying to cover up his infidelity by telling you to have an abortion. I can't tell you what to do, but know that pregnancy is something coming - not going. There will be talk and speculation. Think about that. I advise you to come clean before it is too late.

Is Jesus coming or not?

Dear Joan,

I am now in my early 40s and to tell the truth, I have been listening to one preacher after another tell us that we should repent because Jesus is coming soon. The first time I heard that message with the altar call given, I felt a bit scared and went and commited my life.

But after the fright of the moment wore off, I was back to my old ways. The truth is, I am not in any particular hurry to give up all the fun I am having right now. Church seems so restricted. There are so many things I can't do. I want to attend parties, drink until I am drunk, and have as many girls as I can finance.

Honestly, I do believe that

preachers should stop scaring people and making it seem as if Jesus is going to be coming any day soon. I bet that long after I depart this world, they will still be preaching about this soon-coming king. I am not against religion. I plan to go into church when I am tired of this lifestyle. I just think they could cool off this urgency stuff.

- H.G.

Dear HG,

Wow! After reading your letter, I am here totally amazed! Where is that sense of gratitude for God sparing your life so that you can see another day? My friend, as the Bible says, 1,000 years is as one day to God. The second coming of the Lord may seem like it's forever. You might even deceive yourself into believing it will never occur, but rest assured that it will.

You are also looking at things the wrong way. Though Jesus' second coming might not happen just yet, there is no guarantee that you will have the chance to 'go into church' when you are tired of your lifestyle. Life is not promised to anyone. I would encourage you not to take play around with your soul. Unfortunately, a lot of people do not believe in the second coming of Christ. They falsely think that this life here on Earth is where it is until death puts a stop to it. But whether you believe or not does not change God's word. I would encourage you to take your salvation more seriously than that.

I pray you turn your back on your sinful lifestyle before it is too late.

God bless you!

n Do you have an issue in the Church and need guidance? Send questions to familyandreligion@gleanerjm.com.