Mon | Aug 21, 2017

Chad Francis- An Incomparable Dad

Published:Saturday | March 5, 2016 | 3:00 AMTamara Bailey
Chad and Chadale.
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Mandeville, Manchester

"He takes the view that no one else in this world has a father and if they do, they can never compare to me," Chad Francis. This is how son, Chadale, feels about his one-in-a-million father, who despite not being properly prepared mentally for his arrival, has risen to the occasion and continuously makes an indelible mark on the life of his firstborn.

"When I found out I was going to be a father, I can clearly recall being scared, wondering how my family was going to react. I wasn't really prepared to be a father or maybe I was prepared to be one, but wasn't sure I could handle being one. However, through all that, I did, in fact, have a great support system in my family and I was determined to be the best father I could be."

At the first sight of a life he helped to create, Francis was brought to tears at how amazing the experience was.

"I saw somebody that looked like me! I was overjoyed and immensely pleased. Yeah, I even shed some tears. I couldn't believe that the day had arrived. Hearing his cry for the first time at around 6:47 p.m. at Hargreaves Memorial Hospital, it was just an amazing and proud feeling. Oh boy, this was the best moment of my life and actually being there made the moment even more special!" he exclaimed.

Though they now live in separate parishes, Francis boasts that he is still able to maintain a great relationship with Chadale.

"We have a special bond that allows us to communicate openly with each other and, at these times, we discuss everything that is happening in our lives and we keep an open communication channel. I try to ensure that the times we spend together are special and so I ensure that he experiences new places and new things."

He continued, "I allow him to decide the things we spend the day doing and, at times, decide where we should go. Those days, I allow him to be the boss; whatever he says goes. I try to ensure that whatever we do or wherever we go, he will always remember going there and spending it with his father."

SPOILING A CHILD

With the tendency to spoil a child, especially a firstborn, Francis relates that it is important to give to the child only that which is deserved and beneficial.

"Never spoil your child even though anything my child desires, as long as it is beneficial to him or will help with his development, he will receive. I believe it's not just the giving, but the understanding while doing it. We have to let the child know the reason behind it and the cost of doing it, so they can appreciate and take better care of the things they receive or have better judgment in what they are allowed to do. There are always limitations and a child should not feel as if he is in total control and must get whatever he desires."

He admits that though there are no set guidelines to follow when parenting, there are fundamental elements to a good father-son relationship.

"As a father, you want to have a relationship with your son, where he is not afraid to approach you about anything. Your son must be able to see you as the person who gives the best advice. You must always be there for your son; if not physically you must be reachable by some means of contact. Offering encouragement and being supportive are equally important - always encourage your son to believe in himself and to work hard at reaching the goal he has set for himself."

Putting in the plans and the work for his son to reach his maximum potential Francis, ultimately wants an extraordinary version of himself.

"I want him to be better than me in assets, personality, and well-being. And to buy the house he plans to buy for me - LOL. I want my son to be happy at all times. I also want my son to realise that putting God first in is life is the best decision he will ever make."

familyandreligion@gleanerjm.com