Fri | Sep 21, 2018

Hello Mi Neighbour | It's time to get involved

Published:Tuesday | August 2, 2016 | 12:00 AM

One of our drawbacks to building and maintaining good relationships with our fellowmen is our tendency to allow negative emotions to get the better of us. Neighbours who fuss and quarrel are soon to discover that had they applied a little more common sense and self-control, all that fussing and quarrelling could have been averted. By that time however, with feelings hurt, a lot of damage would already have been done. But, it must be kept in mind that a sincere apology can remedy emotional wounds.

It is said that the continuous accumulation of negative emotions within the mind can compromise our health and happiness, which often makes us incapable of building good relationships with others. This is often played out at the workplace, in the community, in the home, at the worship centre, where these compressed emotions always cause wrangling among people. It makes a lot of sense, therefore, to pay special attention to and seek out ways to treat fear, shame, guilt, arrogance, envy, jealousy, and greed, which are considered to be negative emotions.

It has long been discovered that one of the best means by which these emotions are kept in check is through the involvement of neighbours in the affairs of others. All neighbours have a part to play in the peace management of their communities. At times it may be a risk to try and quell a quarrel between two parties in the community, but we should always try to ensure that people who cannot control their negative emotions do not hurt themselves and others. "Blessed are the peace makers."

My mother always comes to mind when the subject of peace-making comes up. She had a way of defusing the anger between people who were about to hurt themselves. They always ended up loving her for that. Sometimes all that people need to hear during a fit of anger is a kind, calm, disarming voice with words of wisdom. And, how can I forget Miss Martels, of blessed memory, whose kind voice saved me from committing a wrong (that I would have lived to regret) during a fit of anger?

As I write, I am pretty sure that there is someone in a community somewhere speaking to someone else about controlling a negative emotion. It may be a boyfriend who is planning to hurt his girlfriend because of jealously or an angry brother who is planning to 'duss out a bwoy' who disrespected his mother.

There are many triggers for negative emotions and there are also many ways to control them. When these emotions are triggered, we can control them by:

- Breathing deeply and slowly;

- Discussing the matter with a friend;

- Refocusing - consciously examining your reactions to what you have seen or heard; considering the outcome of a particular action;

- Spending about 15 minutes in a quiet, relaxing environment;

calling for spiritual help.

Another very effective way to control the negative emotions is to reach out with a helping hand every day.

How about helping someone from the list below;




1. Miss Miller for offering a bed base to a neighbour, Kingston;

2. Angella Cooper, Kingston, for a superb act of neighbourliness;

3. Janet, for offering a queen-sized bed to Maureen;

4. Grace, St Catherine, for offering a sewing machine to a neighbour.




- Neighbour, Clarendon - Mother of six had to leave abusive relationship. Asking for a stove, wardrobe, radio, etc.

- Lurline, St Mary - Forced to relocate with teenage girls. Asking for help with a stove and back-to-school supplies.

- Nicole, St Andrew - Asking neighbours for a stroller.

- Marlene - Suffers renal failure and is no longer employable. Asking for material to help build a room.

- Camille, St Catherine - Single mother does not have a bed. Asking for neighbours' help.

- Neighbour, Clarendon - Asking neighbours to help her with a stove and a settee.

To help, please call 334-8165, 884-3866, 299-3412, or deposit to acct # 351 044 276 NCB. (Bank routing #: JNCBJMKX) or send donations to HELLO NEIGHBOUR C/o 53 Half Way Tree Road, Kingston 10; e-mail