Mon | Sep 25, 2017

Courting and the Christian couple

Published:Saturday | September 24, 2016 | 9:00 AMShanique Samuels

Courting is an important activity especially for Christian couples at the premarital stage. As Christians, it is expected that they live a life that is 'good' and 'pleasing' to God. This therefore brings about a Christian's need to know the person whom they may end up marrying, and that is where courting comes in.

Family & Religion reached out to Minister Andre Dixon from the Greater Highway Church of Christ Apostolic in Carterwood, Trelawny who shared his thoughts on the topic.

"During courting one should look for qualities such as spirituality, commitment, sincerity, integrity and common sense. As a Christian you can use these qualities to form the basis of what to look for in a partner. It will also indicate that you may have found someone to be your wife or husband and who could also be your best friend," he said.

Minister Dixon was, however, keen to note that courting doesn't always lead to marriage because there are qualities displayed by one party that isn't necessarily what the other is looking for, so the expected level of compatibility may be missing.

He added that there isn't s a specific time frame as to how soon after courting marriage should take place. "Everyone is different and God's time is not our time. What is important is the amount of time they take to see the qualities in each other and how comfortable they are with each other."

Minister Dixon says he believes the male should always initiate the courting process even though that is not always the case. "The man must be the one to take the first step because God made the woman for the man and you should go for what is yours. I don't believe the lady should make such."

"Courting is not a forgotten practice because people still engage in courting. But one of the issues is that young people in some of the churches are afraid to, or they are not allowed to court because the church doesn't see it fit, hence they get married and no time was spent to observe the qualities of the person. This sometimes leads to broken marriages, severed family relationships and sometimes persons even backsliding from church, to go in search of what they didn't find in the relationship," he explained to Family & Religion.

He also noted that dating and courting are the same thing for Christians but may be different for non-Christians. "Non-Christians date (and court) and sex is most times involved, but for Christians it should be to the point that they take time to know each other.

"I personally don't believe that it is wise to have parents involved in courting like that (on a supervisory level) because they will not reveal everything having their parents around. "Christians should be able to trust themselves and apply 2Corinthians 6: 14 to their lives; 'Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? And what communion hath light with darkness?'," he added.familyandreligion@gleanerjm.com