Dear Counsellor | Husband got co-worker pregnant
Q My husband got a co-worker pregnant. We have been married for three and a half years and we have been trying to have a child. The child was born and the DNA shows that it is his. He wants me to take the baby because the mother cannot afford another child. He claims that the co-worker was having man problems and he went to counsel her, and one thing led to another, and the one time they had sex, she got pregnant.
I do not believe him and I heard from good sources that they were fooling around for a long time. Furthermore, the child does not have his name on the birth certificate because one of them would have to leave the workplace. He wants to 'adopt' the child and then get to put his name on the birth certificate. I do not want the responsibility of raising this child and he says that I am unreasonable. Do you think I am unfair?
A First of all, please tell your husband not to counsel anybody else otherwise he might be carrying home more babies. He is being unfair to you. He wants to have his cake and eat it. He wants to adopt his own child! He is a schemer. Do not go along with his plan. Since he is having a relationship with this woman, he should divorce you and go and marry her, and then he could get to father his child and can then change the name to his.
He does not seem to have your welfare at heart and you are having trust issues. His behaviour is not indicative of interest in the marriage. Seek a marriage counsellor to help you further analyse the situation and what your next move should be.