Sun | Sep 23, 2018

Missing you on Mother’s Day

Published:Saturday | May 12, 2018 | 12:00 AMShanna kaye Monteith/ Gleaner Writer

"This time of year is usually the hardest for me," said Gregory Williams* who had lost his mother at the age of 17 to a motor vehicle crash.

He was referring to Mother's Day, a time when social media and public spaces are rich with an outpouring of love and appreciation for mothers.

Sadly, it was also around this time when his mother passed away.

And though the dreadful happening was years ago, Williams told Family and Religion that every time May comes around, he relives the moment that he received the call and the dreadful days that followed.

"I don't really want to go in too much detail because I have been willing myself, though to no avail, to forget what it felt like.

"It was a Saturday, and I was at school practising with my friends as we were in the exam period. I hadn't paid my phone much attention for a few hours, and when I checked, I had some missed calls from family members.

"I was a bit worried but never once thought it would be about the death of my mother," he said as he recalled what happened some six years ago.

Admitting that he does get jealous sometimes when he sees others with their mothers, he explained that he is also overcome with admiration.

MIXEDFEELINGS

According to him: "It's kind of a mixed feeling, if you get me ... . Bittersweet. And nothing hurts me more [than] to see people take advantage of their mothers.

"I can recall a time when I almost got into a fight with my cousin for disrespecting my aunt, who is his mother. I keep having to remind myself that it's nobody's fault why I lost Mum and that I can't go around schooling people on the relationship they need to maintain with theirs."

And of encouragement to others who may have just lost their mothers and are having a hard time coping especially during this time, Williams said: "I honestly don't think I'm at a place where I can advise others on how to cope because I'm still struggling, and I don't even know if I can agree with others who always say it gets better with time. What I can say, though, is that it is better to harbour the good memories, and never try to play the blame game. Thinking of the way in which she left you or even wondering what could have gone differently will only make things worse."

familyandreligion@gleanerjm.com