Hello Mi Neighbour | Words can heal or harm; use them wisely
Hello, mi neighbour! By listening to people's conversations you understand why there is so much strife among people. Many persons do not apply wisdom to their exchanges. They don't know when to speak, when to be silent; when to say what, and what to say when! Because of this, people's feelings get hurt, tempers flare and sparks fly.
Some persons are downright insensitive and others are downright 'donkiah' (don't care). They hurt feelings with words and without self-control, and people fire back. Pride standing in the way, no one is willing to relent until the breath is taken away in some cases.
Many relationships, including marriages, have been destroyed by 'bad words' (not expletives).
Here's a picture: They live in a mansion. The husband showers this housewife with gifts for every occasion and more: anniversaries, Christmas, Valentine's, you name it. He treats her at the finest restaurants and most luxurious hotels. When she is ready to shop, he doles out the dollars. And he doesn't cheat.
Some men mistakenly believe that all that women desire are material things, 'good loving' and lots of money. So this mild-tempered gentleman, rich in academia and finance but poor in judgement, could not see that his public insults were destructive to his wife. In the presence of his friends, he would order her to shut up every time she made a comment or shared an opinion.
After their separation, followed by a divorce, she told her friends that while her husband was an excellent provider in many ways, he did not provide the support she needed at those crucial moments. Instead, he crushed her with insulting words and refused to understand that he was causing her grief.
So, instead of living a life all these years, she lived a lie. Now out of that mental prison, her self-assigned mission is to warn couples of the danger 'bad words' like stupid, foolish, idiot, lazy, stingy, etc, play in destroying good relationships.
Think before you speak
We must understand that words play a vital role in our well-being. Anthony spent 20 years behind bars because he had to 'deal wid di a bway' who 'dissed' his mother.
So deeply hurt was Anthony over the comment made about his mother that he lost self-control and committed a crime. He admitted, in retrospect, that he lacked wisdom but "wen somet'ing hurt yuh, yuh doan even have time fi tink". And that is why people should think before they speak.
James admonishes us to " ... be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to anger" as we interact with others in private, corporate and public spaces, inclusive of Gordon House.
Sometimes we foolishly take on the persona of tigers, bears, lions, snakes and dogs at the onset of a disagreement. To lower oneself to those levels of existence is an affront to the Creator, who made us with the intelligence and capacity to build and care for one another.
The next time you are tempted to use derogatory words to another human being, stop and think of the negative impact it may have on the individual and the repercussion which may follow. Do the intelligent thing: overcome evil with good, and you'll be glad you did.
Put a smile on the face of someone on the list below and you'll be sure to wear one, also.
Thanks to neighbours
- Neighbour - donation towards neighbour's medication.
- Neighbour - for purchasing food for neighbours.
- Neighbour - for clothing.
Opportunities to help
- Single mother just did surgery and reaching out to neighbours for help - needs food and help for daughter attending high school.
- Unemployed senior citizen - needs a stove to cook her food.
- Pastor Rose, St Mary - asking for food supplies and utensils to help provide food for the hungry in the community.
- Kevauhn - asking for a sewing machine for his mother; also asking for a second-hand laptop.
To help, please call Silton Townsend @ 334-8165, 884-3866, or deposit to acct # 351 044 276 NCB. (Bank routing #: JNCBJMKX) or send donations to HELLO NEIGHBOUR C/o 53 Half Way Tree Road, Kingston 10; Paypal/credit card: email: email@example.com. Or contact e-mail firstname.lastname@example.org Mr Townsend exclusively manages the collections and distributions mentioned in this column and is neither an employee nor agent of The Gleaner.