Fri | Nov 16, 2018

Stuck in life's quick sand?

Published:Sunday | October 16, 2016 | 12:39 AM

Sometimes we go through periods in our lives when we feel like we are  trapped in quicksand — the more we fight and kick, the deeper we sink. We get worn out by our struggle and negative thoughts stalk us.
Life’s experiences might be every bit as frightening as being trapped in quicksand, but here are some steps for getting out of physical quicksand:

Step 1: Shed weight
Throwing a rock and a feather into water highlights the impact of weight.
If you are stuck in life’s quicksand, get rid of things that are weighing you down.
• Do believe that there is no positive end in sight?
• Do you think the odds are against you?
• Are your pockets filled with grudges, unforgiveness, hurts, malice and hate?
• Do you have a sense of “I just can’t be bothered! I give up?”
• Are you engulfed in infighting?
Shed the baggage to avoid sinking further.

Step 2: Remain calm
Thrashing around in quicksand causes the sediment and water to separate. That is how you sink. Drowning in quicksand is difficult to achieve unless you thrash about sufficiently to submerge yourself.
When we get caught up in life’s quicksand we are tempted to make desperate moves to try to get out. Often, those moves only cause us to sink deeper.

Panic and desperate actions are your worst enemy in those situations. Adopt the mindset that by taking calm, carefully calculated action you will solve the problem.

Step 3: Be patient.
Getting out of physical quicksand can take hours. Time is on your side. You are not going to sink beyond a certain point if you remain relatively still and are not weighed down.

When faced with life’s quicksand, we need to accept that it might take some time to get out. We also need to understand that trying to speed up the process might actually push you down further.

You have to believe that your predicament will not overwhelm you, and that you will overcome at some point. Move steadily to resolve the issue. Make patient progress.

Step 4: Lean backwards as you would do as if floating on water

Because of the sedimentation in the water, it is actually easier to float on quicksand than on water. Leaning backwards also has the benefit of enabling you to gradually get one leg after the other on top of the quicksand.

Sometimes when we are trapped in life’s quicksand, we only start to make real progress when we are on our backs.

In life we may need to be laid low for us to identify and accept the path to success. We get so caught up in expending our energy thrashing and kicking to get out of the mess that we have to be laid low in our best interest.

Being prostrate and still will halt our decline and allow the onset of the process of recovery. Let it go for a while.

Warning: Re rescue
A sharp tug to get you out might actually pull in the rescuer.
Sometimes when we are in life’s quicksand, we run the risk of pulling others into our mess. We have to be careful how we seek help and how it is administered.

Step 5: Paddle to safety
Some people die in quicksand waiting for help that never comes. You need to be engaged in carefully calculated and patient actions to get you out of the mess.

Reversing how you have been thinking might be the key to successfully escape from life’s quicksand. There were actions or lack of action on your part that got you in the quicksand in the first place. Review those actions and take corrective action.

Step 6: Take off the exposed garment to avoid excessive chafing.
Take care to not leave behind any residue of the mess in which you were trapped. Pursue a clean start. Don’t drag the baggage with you.

Now enrolling for the SHRM-credentialed “Certified Behavioral Coach” program.
Trevor E S Smith is a Behaviour Modification Coach with the Success with People Academy home of the “Certified Behavioral Coach” and “3-D Team Leader” international certifications.