Dear Doc | My lover always kisses my feet. What is wrong with him?
Q Dear Doc, I am 38 years old and I recently got divorced from my husband after seven years of marriage. We had a great sex life, but he lied and was always cheating, and I could not take it any longer. I met this new man at work, and things are ok.
But I am a little concerned about his strange behaviour. The problem is that when we are having sex, he spends a lot of time kissing my feet and sucking my toes. What worries me is that it looks like he is more turned on by my feet than the rest of my body. Otherwise, he treats me well and we enjoy each other's company. I am just concerned about this behaviour. I have never been with a man who does this. Can you tell me if something is wrong with him?
A Thank you for your question. This behaviour you speak of is known as podophilia (arousal by feet), a sexual paraphilia (any strong sexual interest in a body part other than the genitals). There are many people with paraphilia, and this does not mean they have a mental illness. The condition is shown to develop during childhood where sexual stimulation was experienced with a particular body part and become associated with it due to brain rewiring.
When the condition starts to become excessive - the main way of achieving sexual arousal or orgasm, it causes distress or guilt to the individual, affects daily activities, it is done with children or non-consenting adults, then it is considered a mental disorder.
People with mild paraphilias can benefit from psychotherapy and sexual exercises with their partner to retrain the brain so that sexual arousal is achieved mainly by genital stimulation of their partner. Needless to say, the success rate is low, and there are frequent relapses; however, once it does not meet the criteria for a mental disorder by becoming excessive, many people are quite happy living with it.
Funny smelling discharge
Q Dear Doc, I am having some discharge that smells like baby puke. It's really creamy, and it doesn't happen until I am going to dedicate, it comes down really heavy. What could be the cause of this?
A Good day, this could be a variation of your normal vaginal secretion, yeast infection, or a sexually transmitted infection, so visit your healthcare provider for an examination or vaginal swab test so that appropriate treatment can be applied.
Concerned about lumps in armpits
Q Dear Doc, I am a 19-year-old female who is currently in sixth form.
My problem is that I have a lump under both my armpits. They aren't currently causing any pain, in fact, they feel as if they're getting better. I am worried because these are signs of breast cancer.
I had a rash between my breasts a few weeks ago, and the same armpit lump appeared which is now gone. But I am concerned about the possibilities behind these appearances.
I shaved my arm pit a few days before these lumps occurred, and my little brother confessed he used my deodorant a few times when he couldn't find his.
Does my condition seem serious?
I did some research and I found out that breast cancer could be an underlying cause of these symptoms. But I checked my family history, and there are no cases of cancer, but I am pretty sure cancer isn't only hereditary. I anxiously await your response.
A Thank you for your question. Breast cancer can occur at any age, but is extremely rare in teenagers. Based on the scenario you described, your armpit lumps are most likely to be inflammatory lymph nodes due to shaving of the armpits and the rash that you described. Having a family history of breast cancer is a significant risk factor. However, breast cancer can also occur in someone with no family history, especially if they have other risk factors such as: smoking, excessive alcohol consumption, obesity, high consumption of red meat, having one's period at an early age, and previous radiation to the chest. Visit your healthcare provider for an assessment and instructions on how to perform a regular breast self-exam.
Cannot maintain and erection
Q Dear Doc, I am a 22-year-old male having several problems. First is my inability to have sex. I am not able to maintain an erection when having sex, which causes several of my partners to be disgruntled. I can masturbate easily and have no problem getting an erection, but once I'm going to penetrate my erection fades. I thought it was the tightness of the condoms, so I tried bareback, but the problem persisted.
Second, for the past three years or so, I've been waking up to my stomach area feeling bloated, sometimes accompanied with pain or the feeling that I have a slow burning fire in my stomach and a hollow sensation from the throat down.
Third, there is a sharp pulsing pain just under my heart. The pulsing is not in tune with my heartbeat but seems random. I noticed the pain around a year or so ago.
My fourth problem is that I believe I have had prostatitis most of my life. I recently wondered why my rectum felt full even though I had just used the bathroom. I gave myself a self examination, and was struck with a great deal of pain when I tapped my prostate. I researched the symptoms of prostate diseases (since cancer runs in my family), and matched the symptoms of prostatitis with the various oddities I've experienced over the years i.e., pain urinating and climaxing.
My final issue is an unusual one. As long as I can remember, I've had pain coming from my hair follicles. Hair from my scalp, eyelashes, beard, chest, pubic areas, arms and legs, all at some point or the other give a stab of pain when touched.
I've tried shaving and plucking the problem hairs, but a few days later another hair follicle starts up, sometimes multiple. I don't know what to do. I would appreciate your insight and help thank you.
A Thank you for your questions. The fact that you can maintain an erection during masturbation, suggests that your problem is not a physical one and may be due to anxiety, particularly concern about your ability to satisfy your partner.
Having intercourse with one steady partner who is patient and understanding may help. Some men also fear that their erection may not be firm enough to penetrate their partner, they fear that their penis may get trapped inside the vagina. This requires education or counselling by your healthcare provider or sex therapist.
On your second issue, having meals (especially large ones) before you go to sleep, can cause an acid reflux which can causes burning. The condition is treatable, however, adopting a healthier diet, avoiding alcohol, smoking, managing daily stress and having the last meal about three hours before going to sleep can help alleviate the problem and prevent a recurrence.
The sharp pulsing pain under your heart is most likely due to the acid reflux you are experiencing. However, please visit your healthcare provider to rule out any heart disease. The symptoms you described are highly suggestive of prostatitis so please seek treatment.
Generalised painful hair follicles (roots) are usually a sign of vitamin deficiency (A, B complex and C). The condition may also occur in immunocompromised individuals such as those who have HIV or diabetes where the hair follicles are infected with bacteria/ fungus. Rarely, it may be caused by bathing or swimming in stagnant water or shaving without prior cleaning of the skin, or use of unsterilised razors.