A meaningful marriage

Charles and Valda Edwards, with son Robert

Omar Tomlinson, Staff Reporter

'WITHOUT LOVE, marriage is meaningless.'

So said Charles Edwards in describing his 30-year marriage to Valda.

Charles, 70, has been wheelchair-bound for the past five years, but his love for his 71-year-old wife is healthy and strong. In fact, she is the 'apple of his eye.'

The Edwardses, who will celebrate their 30th wedding anniversary on June 24, met in a tenement yard on St. Joseph's Road, eight years before they tied the knot.

Valda had just moved out of her relatives' house into a one-bedroom apartment with her female cousin. Charles lived on the same compound.

Valda confessed that living next door to a man at that time made her nervous and she said she remained on guard whenever he was around.

During that time Charles tried to be kind by offering her cigarettes which she refused and even invited her to come into his apartment to listen to her favourite radio soap opera, 'Portia Faces Life'. Instead, she stayed by the window and listened.

Of course, Charles had romantic designs at that time, but realised that he had to be patient. In fact, he admired her quiet nature and appreciated the fact that she did not have too many friends. He saw her as compatible to his own personality.

As time passed, Valda began to warm to his overtures. She recalled that when Charles first extended an invitation for her to go to the movies, she declined.

Having just come home from work, she told him that "If I was to drop down on the road, I would prefer if people said it was because I was tired from work, rather than I was having too much fun at the movies."

However, when Valda decided to move from St. Joseph's Road to premises on Julian Drive, Charles gave her the money to find a place so both of them could live together. She agreed, because she was convinced that he had no other romantic involvements.

After living together for eight years, they decided to get married.

Before meeting Charles, Valda had a son, Servine. The couple also raised an adopted son, Robert and several other children whom they fostered.

Love abounded at the Edwardses' house, but morals and values were upheld as well.

Robert, who is now a medical student at the University of the West Indies, had high praises for his parents: "Whatever I am today, I owe to them. They provided all the right ingredients in growing up -- love, respect, discipline."

Life in the Edwardses' household has not been a bed or roses. When Charles' legs were amputated as a result of a tragic collision with a trailer, life changed.

Valda recalled that although she was devastated by the situation, her faith and determination helped to see her husband through the difficult time.

And Charles said losing his legs made him reassess his life and within a couple months, he began to adjust to the fact that he would have to live without his legs.

"Sometimes, I feel frustrated," Valda said regarding her husband's condition. "But I've accepted it and realise I can't do anything about it."

While Valda was away on a two-week trip to visit her son in the United States last year (Charles doesn't like to travel abroad), she was so preoccupied with thinking about her husband and whether he was eating, drinking or sleeping properly, that she was relieved to return home to him.

Both were quick point out that marriages today seemed empty and baseless, compared to their days when couples got married for love, first and foremost.

Nowadays, Charles said, "Very few people have that important ingredient in their union."

And Valda's advice to those thinking about marriage: "Love thinketh no evil. Love unconditionally." While Charles warns: "Don't make a joke of marriage."

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