Eulalee ThompsonONE THING that Elaine (not her real name) remembers as a little girl is that bedtime was not about soft lights and goodnight kisses; instead it had become the time of day when her heart was filled with the most apprehension. She remembers always going to bed in a pair of black tights or jeans shorts. She was trying to ward off the abuser that lived within.
There is no typical profile of a person who will sexually abuse a child. Psychologists says the abuser could be anyone - the child's father, step-father, uncle, a trusted family friend or the nice-looking man who lives next door. Overseas studies indicate that the majority of sexual abusers are known to the child and that the abusers are men found in all the socio-economic classes, occupations and neighbourhoods.
While there is no typical profile, the experts agree that the sexual abuse of children is aberrant behaviour and the man (or woman) who sexually abuses a child is inflicted with a psychopathology.
Local research on the sexual abuser is lacking, but counselling psychologist Dr. Angela Gordon-Stair indicates there is a mix of motivating factors including cultural beliefs (that might support, rationalise or trivialise male abuse), myths and psychopathology.
She said among some Jamaican men, there is still the myth of entitlement to their daughters. This might be linked, she said, to a not uncommon feeling among some Jamaicans that the child is theirs, they own them and they are like an old-age pension.
"So, there is the sick notion that I am spending the money on you and I must taste 'the first milk'. Then there are individuals who believe that as soon as the child is beginning to look like a woman, she is fair game, " Mrs. Gordon-Stair said.
Another common myth, though she believes it is declining in popularity, is that some men believe sexual intercourse with a virgin will cure sexually transmitted diseases (STDs).
Some of the abusers might be paedophiles this is abnormal behaviour where the abuser is sexually attracted to children. The condition is usually caused by psychological and social factors that would have affected the abuser's sexual development. However, with no research on the abusers here, Dr. Gordon-Stair is unable to say how widespread this mental disorder might be.
A central characteristic of child sexual abuse is the dominant position of an adult that allows him to manipulate the child. Dr. Gordon-Stair says it involves fondling of the child (or the child being requested to fondle the adult), anal contact and vaginal or sexual intercourse. Sexual abuse might also include behaviour that gratifies the adult, for example, exposing oneself to the child, masturbating in the child's presence or secretly watching the child undress.
All children are at risk. In Jamaica, babies as young as a month old have been sexually abused. Most abused children suffer psychological damage even into adulthood. Some of them suffer long-standing depression, anxiety disorder, substance abuse, post-traumatic stress disorder, suicidal thoughts, self-destructive tendencies and psychosomatic illnesses.
Dr. Gordon-Stair said since abused children become sexualised at an early age and they might associate sex with being loved and cared for. Some of them might therefore become promiscuous. Others become fearful of sexual activity and experience burdensome feelings of shame and guilt.
She said it's important for parents to develop a caring relationship with their children and encourage them to confide in them. Parents should also be aware of some telltale signs of trouble such as a drop in school performance, withdrawn behaviour, inappropriate weeping, changes in sleeping and eating patterns. She suggested that even small children can be empowered to recognise inappropriate touching.
