Juette RamocanTHERE ARE a few parents who take time out to have a decent conversation with their teenager on spirituality, life, money, sex and education.
Very often guidance counsellors in schools say that not enough emphasis is placed on discussing sexuality in the home because some parents are afraid to deal with the subject for lack of information, while others are preoccupied with their work.
It, therefore, becomes the guidance counsellor's task to enlighten the students on the changes their bodies go through and how to avoid pregnancy.
However, while students are taught about sex in school, not enough emphasis is placed on the matter of self-control or the increasing trend sexual behaviour patterns such as incest. There are many issues about sexuality that have been left open to our youth such as sexual addiction, masturbation, sex phone fantasies, fetish sex, celibacy, sexual orientation/lifestyle, pornography and oral sex. Sharon Hare, guidance counsellor at the Edna Manley College for the Visual and Performing Arts, said teens need to know more about controlling their urges and not allowing them to control them. They need to know about sexual attraction to the opposite sex and learning to express their sexuality appropriately, she said..
She also explained that some normal activities such as masturbation can become abnormal, when they are done in excess. In such an instance, she said the person should get psychological help.
She also warned against the addiction to phone sex, oral sex and pornography, which is being increasingly used for entertainment purposes.
"Sex is supposed to be a meaningful statement of love. However, pornography is a degrading act which exploits sex," she said.
On the matter of bi-sexuality Miss Hare said: "Some young people think it is genetic (which is still yet to be proven), while some are confused or adventurous and get involved as a means of gaining attention from their peers."
Lewd conduct, such as having sex in public places, is usually a sign of rebellion and a free spirited mind, but is not culturally accepted, she said.
"Suppressing the desire for sex won't help. It is best to understand your urges, against the background of religious beliefs," the guidance counsellor advise.
