THE EDITOR, Sir:
"LOVE CAN'T pay the bills." How often have you heard this statement? I've heard it a lot, and guess what? I totally agree. I do not believe that love alone should dictate marriage. I won't start from 'scratch' with any man! Hence, I would NEVER marry a man who has no ambition, is uneducated or poor.
Face facts, my salary alone or our love alone for that matter cannot pay the bills, buy grocery, school our three children and have surplus for recreation. STOP! Don't think I'm greedy, 'cause I'm definitely not. Moreover, I do not intend to depend on any husband for total financial support. What I need, however, is for us to be compatible in every way. "Every hoe have dem tick a bush."
I've seen people get married despite their opposing educational background because they 'love' each other. But for how long does the marriage last? Many times people say, "it's the differences in people that draw them together." Nonsense! It is only a few people who know how to work together despite their contradictory personalities. What would happen if I love going to parties and my husband has a phobia for crowds? What would happen if he likes mountain climbing and I'm afraid of height? Would our love be able to bring us to a mutual agreement every time honestly?
In the same instance, what if I'm middle-class and my husband is working class? Picture this: I'm a journalist; I have a meeting with the media management, however, I contract a very bad flu and won't be able to make it; the meeting is so important they tell me to send my husband instead. What? Did they say I'm to jump off a cliff? I would definitely go crazy, for what could my husband (who by the way is a garbage collector) possibly say on behalf of me? Nothing but garbage. I would be utterly embarrassed.
I'm positive that a dog cannot take a cat for a mate; neither can a cow take a goat. Why? They are different species; they are in different categories. I'm sure too, that if Mr. Patterson should marry a 'janitress', everybody would go 'nuts'! The Prime Minister a janitress? Similarly, I will not marry a man with whom I'm incompatible or is of a 'low class'. I'm thinking about the communication barrier, the fact that we'll have 'different' friends and not to mention the fact that he will feel less of a man when I'm earning more than he is, which will eventually lead to jealousy; and then...?
I am, etc.,
SHANEKA HENRY
Trinity District
Porus P.O.
Manchester
