By Nordia Henry, Staff ReporterRECENTLY I read a letter to the editor with the headline 'Reach out to dad this Father's Day' and I am compelled to reply because it bothered me somewhat.
In our society today, no lucid person should wonder why more prominence is given to Mother's Day than Father's Day. The answer is obvious: Most Jamaican mothers also play the role of fathers and this fact is evident in the importance attached to Mother's and Father's Day celebrations.
It is regrettable that so many Jamaican fathers tend to run away from their responsibilities, leaving the mothers alone to raise the children. Some of these men have the impudence to want to claim you as their own after you have grown up and performed well. If the performance is outstanding enough, some even want the entire universe to know that he is your father. It's only then that they realise the importance of identity.
I am appalled by these insensitive creatures because the only reason they want to claim you in later life is to drench your soul, both financially and emotionally. They want everyone to know that, the sparkling star you have become is their production. They want to inveigle everyone into thinking they had some involvement in your success.
Of course, they did, they are
our sperm donors. Had it not been for them we would not have been given the opportunity to make a mark.
CELEBRATE GRANDMOTHERS
The Bible says that we must honour our parents, but it also says that we must not feed a lazy man. Tell me now, how can it be fair that a mother struggles to provide the best for her children and then the father comes along after they have grown into accomplished adults expecting them to take care of him? This, after he wasted his young years running away from his responsibilities.
I must say that this is sheer nonsense!
Come to think of it, maybe there should even be a day set aside to celebrate grandmothers. So many of them have assumed the responsibility of being mother and father to their grandchildren.
Today, as in the past, grandmothers are the ones inspiring us and lifting us up from the pit of abandonment. With centuries of grace and beauty, they stand as bridges that lead us into new worlds. They correct us with statements like, "I'll knock you into the middle of next week" and "I'm not the one who brought you into this world, but I'll knock you out." Often, these comments are declared with a hand on the hip and a half-grin on the face.
I started living with my grandmother at age eight. My mother was healthy and I did not know my dad. I felt really great because my grandmother ensured that I went to the finest schools and got quality education. She struggled with me and was there for me through trials and triumphs. In fact, I never saw my parents until I graduated from school that's when they wanted to claim me rightfully. I told them in no uncertain terms that, "I am a woman now and what I have achieved, I have no one to thank but my dear, sweet old grandmother who mothered and fathered me."
TOWER OF STRENGTH
My grandmother was the one who gave me boxing gloves to fight for my convictions. She guided me to follow my passions. She saw the butterfly in me when I didn't believe I could spread my wings and fly. I've always hoped that she would be alive to see the day when I start working and that I would be able to take care of her the way she had taken care of me.
Thankfully, she's still alive. On February 5 she turned 82. Today, I am proud and I stand tall because of her nurturing.
When I reflect on the terrifying days of struggle, it has made me realise that grandmothers are not defined by words alone, or by who they are but by what they do. They are super moms, kissing you when you leave for school and welcoming you with open arms when you return home. Grandmothers are our mothers when we are in trouble and our mothers when we triumph. They are the anonymous presence who is there when we are up and when we are down. They are our foundation.
