Amina Blackwood Meeks, Contributor
WELL, SEE we here now, couple days after Crismus and, judging by the way some people start behaving areddi, is like Crismus gone long time. Miss Lady want to know if you ever noticed how for some people de Crismus cheer done as soon as de bakkle empty?
Yes, she sey as soon as de spirits dun, de Spirit a Crismus fly outa dem an nadda kind a duppy teck ova. An straightway dem pawn up de same empty bakkle an head into anedda kine a bakkle.
As far as dem is concerned is dat Boxing Day mean. An dem box right back till nex year Crismus Day pausing only to replenish an refuel fe de bakkle at hand or wherever dem tink de war is.
BATTLE OF THE BULGE
Some people start a war wid dem middle. For is like dem save up all dem appetite all year fe de mont of December forgetting that whatsoever is done in de dark must come out to light.
You see when de light reveal how much dem is going to have to spend pan new clothes if dem want to go anywhere New Year's Eve a deh so is de prekkeh.
All de same doagh, on de odda hand is like is dat some people want. Dem save up dem skimpiest clothes fe wear out fe de occasion fe demonstrate how totally unnecessary clothes is.
An same way like how what is in yu mine control yu bady ah same way de bady get de message sey, no clothes is to stay which part people tink clothes is to stay. Clothes start twis an turn an roll dowan or roll up as it have a mind. Dat is part one of the bakkle of de bulge.
Part two is when dem an dem partner, similarly expanded teck to de dance floor. See prekkeh deh! Den and dere is where dem might wish dat dem did save likkle of de eatings fe people who wudda thankful fe small morsels.
For Miss Lady sey dat once upon a time people used to box up leftovers an give it to de deserving poor. But is like nowadays poor realise sey dem deserve likkle more.
As a matter of fack, if de Crismus Day cheer cudda find a way fe stretch to de balance of de year maybe dere wouldn't be so many deserving poor who get less dan ole clothes and tuff bun into de Boxing Day boxes, like is a disaster relief programme, an de number of dose on de have not side of de line a fling stone an empty champagne flute afta de one dem pan de have side of de divide in the Bakkle Against Poverty would be less.
Miss Lady sey she is personally convinced that such a war might not even be necessary. For from she likkle bit till now it is going on an kean stap an some still a drap biff while odders can barely meck it on time!
EMPTY BOXES
You know some people believe sey Boxing Day is de time fe get rid a all de thousand empty boxes what did have in presents de night before but now jus a teck up space into de house and meck it look chaka chacka.
De problem is where and how dem get rid of it. Miss Lady sey if you was to have de stomach to go dung into some gully, an haul off de gift card affa de box den you would be simply surprised as to de source of garbage dat blocking up de drains, resulting in a proliferation of mosquitoes, overwork pan de poor sanitation workers an put some community into a state most unbefitting of community tourism.
So she is issuing a call for houses to be rid of empty boxes in a way to say that we believe that we still have an environment that is worth protecting and could be preserved.
For anyhow we lose dat dawg gane wid we supper, tourist gane someplace else wid dem dalla an nex year everybody mawga dung. Dat would take care of the Battle of the Bulge and at the same time and in one felt swoop all who love laugh afta how odda people look wudda laas a vital source of entertainment.
See dat? A nuff nuff likkle ways we beat up pan we wan anedda an doan even tink sey we guilty.
Miss Lady sey if we cudda only find de way fe work de odda part a de brain, de part whey dormant till Crismus come. An res de part what kean seem to dormant fe too long everyting wudda criss. So a dat she a hope fah.
Jus fe all a we teck off de gloves and try something else. Just try see if Crismus cudda laas a likkle longer dis year.
