Dear Counsellor,
MY GRANDSON is four years old and is always reluctant to have his meals. His mother is frustrated with this. He is very energetic and drinks a lot.
He is also bright in school. Could you give her some suggestions to help to encourage her son to have his meals, and make meal times a happy rather than stressful time for him?
Could you also tell me if I am wrong in my thinking that he has to have someone to comfort him when he is hurting? Whenever his mother disciplines him and he is hurting, he comes to me for comfort and I comfort him, he gets upset with me and says that I spoil him. I don't let him feel he is right; I just offer a little comfort. Is she right and am I wrong?
I would be grateful if you could give me a website that I could visit to get information to pass on to her. Parenting is so important but we don't have access to the proper information as to how to proceed.
Concerned Grandma
Dear Reader,
There are two issues here. One has to do with the child and his eating habits and the other with discipline. While children are growing up, it is understandable that they are going to display difficulties with their eating habits. Provided they are having balanced and healthy meals at regular and appropriate intervals do not become too anxious.
On the matter of discipline, this is a common problem. You should both agree that the mother should discipline the child. When she does so, you, the grandmother should not comfort the child. It may actually undermine the effort of his mother. Discipline must be firm, consistent and loving. When you intervene you may be undermining the mother's effort. Please desist from comforting the child; this could create major problems for the child later.
Our counsellors are here for you. You may write to them at : Your Health, c/o The Gleaner, 7 North Street, Kingston; email: yourhealth@gleanerjm.com.
