Marigold Harding, Contributor

HARDING

Christmas is a time of giving and receiving gifts and it might be appropriate to remind ourselves of the dos and dont's as it relates to the presentation, response and acknowledgement of gifts.

The importance of the occasion should be given prime consideration and will help you to decide whether the gift is perishable or temporary, e.g., flowers, foodstuff, beverage or tickets to an event. These are usually the most popular gifts. Or, enduring gifts that last and can serve as a reminder of an event or special milestone.

Relationship

Usually, your gift choices are affected by who you are giving them to and the nature of your relationship. When you are opening a gift in the presence of the donor, thank the donor with enthusiasm, even if it is the last thing you wanted. Mask any disappointment, be pleasant, and say something like. "What an imaginative choice," or "It's nice of you to think of me in that way."

Say thanks quickly

All gifts should be acknowledged and 'thanks' should be prompt. Gifts of money should be acknowledged, stating how it will be used when thanking the donor. It is all right to mention the amount. Say something like, "Your cheque for (the amount) is going to help in furnishing my apartment or build up my savings account."

Write thank you notes for holiday gifts and birthday gifts as soon as possible, preferably within two to three days of receipt. Children who are old enough to write are old enough to write their own thank you notes.

Unexpected gifts

When someone offers you an unexpected gift for the holiday there is little you can do other than say. "Oh, you shouldn't have, but thank you." If it is early in the season you could present the person with a gift later.

Duplicated gifts

If someone gives you something you already have, it is all right to exchange the duplicated item, but you must be careful in handling the exchange. Simply say, for example, "I love the blender so much but since I already own one I didn't think that you would mind if I exchanged it for a toaster oven. Thanks for making my life easier in the kitchen." This is popularly known as 're-gifting'.

Awful gifts

The last thing you would want to do is hurt the donor's feelings. While your 'thank you' should be gracious you really do not want to lie and sometimes you might even wonder what the giver was thinking. Instead of mentioning the gift in detail stress your appreciation instead for their thoughtfulness and generosity.

High-Maintenance gifts

Be careful to whom you give such a gift. Make sure the receiver is capable of maintaining the gift with ease and it would be really appreciated.

Too expensive gifts

This will depend on whether the gift is personal or a business gift. If it is personal say, " It is stunning" or "It is gorgeous, but you really didn't have to." Or, "I love (whatever the gift is) but, something less expensive would be just as appreciated coming from a friend like you." If it a business gift it could be interpreted as a bribe. If it is a company gift you could say, "Company policy does not allow gifts over a certain price," but say thanks nonetheless.

If you are accustomed to exchanging gifts with close friends and relatives but for economic reasons you are unable to do so at this time, you may set the tone by sending a card early or simply say "This year, as you know, things have not been easy as we have had to send Joe to boarding school abroad so we could only exchange cards."

Always show thoughtfulness and consideration when exchanging gifts, and certainly show appreciation and say thanks when you receive same.