Why are educated women manless?
Published: Monday | March 9, 2009
Keisha Shakespeare-Blackmore, Staff Reporter
Educated women can't seem to find good men. Are they too independent, too picky or is it that today's men just don't meet their high standards?
There are many factors working against an educated woman in her quest for the right partner. These include statistics, which show more females enrolled at the tertiary level in Jamaica compared to their male counterparts. An article in The Gleaner, published on September 20, 2007, it stated: "Statistics from the University of the West Indies (UWI) show that some 82 per cent of the[total number of students] who matriculated to the institution [that] academic year were female." Also, data from the Correctional Services show that there are 96 per cent (3,939) of men who are incarcerated, compared to 4 per cent (151) of females. And, outside of those who are imprisoned or undereducated, the few good men are already taken (married or in a committed relationship). Plus, with so many instances of homosexuality coming to light, educated women are placed at a further disadvantage.
Jennifer Blake* is 30 years old. She has a university degree, she is beautiful, has her own car and a job yet she cannot find a good man.
She told Flair that she believes the average man is intimidated by a successful, beautiful and educated woman.
"Men need to feel like they are needed, so if you are independent, they just don't know how to deal with it," said Blake.
She added that men are used to women who are needy. Thus when a man meets a strong, educated woman who knows what she wants out of life, he is unable to relate because such a woman keeps him on his toes. As such, she said they (some men) go for women who are less educated and easier to 'handle'.
Must have versus want
Blake noted that it is not that she must have a man, but at times she wants a man to say 'hey, you are beautiful'. She also said having a man would help ease the pressure, financially, and provide someone to be intimate with. She added that she is not desperate so she will not settle for a man who does not make the cut. Instead, he should be intelligent and able to understand that she is an independent woman who will have friends and go out without them from time to time.
Sandra James* also has trouble finding the right guy. She is 28 years old, very attractive, in a decent job and making strides educationally and in her career. With all that you'd think it would be easy to find Mr Right!
She believes that her first serious relationship ended abruptly two years ago because she decided to pursue her dreams.
"I had a goal and a direction in life but my partner did not agree with the direction in which I wanted my life to go so that caused problems in the relationship," said James.
She said when she took a job opportunity in another country and went away, her partner decided to end the relationship.
"I think that men are used to women being the ones to follow them wherever they go, but when it's the reverse, they find it hard to handle."
She thinks men are intimidated by women who express themselves intelligently and hold their own opinions.
Stubborn and hard-headed
"Even in my present, tumultuous relationship, I have been accused of being stubborn and hard-headed."
She added that the problem with men is that they expect you to be a 'yes sir' type of girl and not have an opinion. If you are not then they are turned off from you and don't want you.
At the end of the day, educated women will either end up alone or having to share the few good men who are available, with another woman or man. What do you think? Let us know at: firstname.lastname@example.org
*Names changed to protect identity.