SUNDAY SAUCE: The scorpion and the thug
Published: Sunday | October 11, 2009
Jamaican Thug: Hey, wadz up?
Jamaican Thug: What that mean?
Scorpion: Age, sex and location.
Jamaican Thug: Yow, the I is a man. A what you a deal wid? You noh si mi name thug?
Scorpion: But dem have woman thug too, so that's why mi ask.
Jamaican Thug: Well, I don't know bout any woman thug. So you a what, man or woman?
Scorpion: Woman scorpion.
Jamaican Thug: Them one deh bite hot.
Scorpion: You done know, so you want mi come bite you? (lol)
Jamaican Thug: I don't deal wid them things deh, so come affa that.
Scorpion: What you talking bout? Mi just seh mi want come bite you, bite can mean anything.
Jamaican Thug: Mi affi mek sure because a whole heap a kinky things a gwaan bout yah.
Scorpion: Anyway, just cool nuh, relax and tell mi you age.
Jamaican Thug: Woman don't want tell them age yet them want know man age.
Scorpion: Man you dark sah.
Jamaican Thug: Then nuh true? Tell mi you age then.
Scorpion: Awright mi a 23.
Jamaican Thug: Mi a 25 still, suh, you look good?
Scorpion: Suh dem sey.
Jamaican Thug: Dem who?
Scorpion: Mi fren them.
Jamaican Thug: Fren them? Suh whey yuh man deh?
Scorpion: Don't have none.
Jamaican Thug: How come?
Scorpion: The last one mi have him was too mean. Whey your woman deh?
Jamaican Thug: We kinda low key. A mi baby mother still, but shi deh pon a different ends.
Scorpion: Suh you don't want come pon my ends?
Jamaican Thug: Mi affi see a who mi a talk to fuss.
Scorpion: But mi done tell you sey mi look good.
Jamaican Thug: Never see any scorpion weh look good.
Scorpion: Well, this one is very hot, only the mean man dem nuh want spend.
Jamaican Thug: A pure mean argument you a pon, I don't like dem vibes deh.
Scorpion: Suh you mean too?
Jamaican Thug: All a unoo feel seh man must spend money pon unoo like wi a bank.
Scorpion: Then a so it go. Nothing is free. a pure mean man inna this chat room.
Jamaican Thug: So wait deh, a tell yuh a tell mi seh a sell you a sell?
Scorpion: No, you coulda mad, but yuh affi tek care a yuh property.
Jamaican Thug: Mi feel seh everybody must tek care a himself so that yuh nuh feel obligated to nobody.
Scorpion: Yes, but man must care fi woman.
Jamaican Thug: And woman must care fi man, but most time a wi alone just a give so.
Scorpion: But unoo a get too.
Jamaican Thug: Get what?
Scorpion: Yuh done know.
Jamaican Thug: Well, a two a wi a benefit from it.
Scorpion: So yuh seh.
Jamaican Thug: So noh true?
Jamaican Thug: Answer noh
Jamaican Thug: Yuh gone?
Jamaican Thug: Are you still there?
Jamaican Thug: Scorpion, come bite mi noh, whey yuh gone?!