Green with envy

Glenford Smith, Career Writer glenfordsmith@yahoo.com

Despite the clichéd familiarity of the saying, 'green with envy', my guess is that you have never met anyone who actually turned green.

But the chances are great that you have met many envious people at work and elsewhere.

Perhaps, like most people, you've even been envious of someone at some time in your career.

The problem is that envy is not as easily spotted as simply looking for 'green'.

It is, nonetheless, possible to spot it both in yourself and in other people. A person seething with envy will show the telltale signs of resentment, fault-finding and frequent criticisms, intense dislike and possibly attempts at undermining the person who is the object of his or her envy. Understanding and dealing with your own envy, or that of someone who envies you, is extremely important as envy takes a heavy toll on relationships, personal happiness and work productivity.

Envy is not jealousy, although the words are often used interchangeably, according to Richard Smith, professor of psychology at the University of Kentucky in an interview by Psychology Today magazine.

He explains: "Jealousy arises when a relationship is infringed on by a rival, who threatens to take away something that is, in a sense, rightfully yours. Envy, on the other hand, derives from the basic fact that so much of the spoils of life come from how we compare with others. It arises when another person possesses some trait or object that you want, and includes a mix of discontent, a sense of inferiority, and a frustration that may be tinged with resentment."

Some of the most common causes of envy at work include the instances when one person gets a promotion that someone else wanted; when one person earns more money and enjoys some privileges that someone else is dying to get, but just can't seem to do well enough to earn.

Whenever one is simply more successful at work, he or she is likely to be envied. Envious people can usually find every reason to resent the more successful performer but rarely look at the real source of their feelings of resentment towards others - within themselves.

It is our own feelings of inadequacy, helplessness and inferiority that cause us to look with envy at others, who are more successful and more accomplished. This is good news, in a way. If the source of envy is within us, then we can get rid of it, nothing about the other person has to change to make us happy.

Feelings of low self-esteem can spawn many potentially problematic consequences like overeating, anger and low performance.

To eliminate envy and the problems it can cause, begin to use other people's successes as motivation. Learn from successful people rather than envy them. Everyone has the latent potential for greater achievements. There is no need to envy others their success - we can be successful too.

By learning from those ahead of us and applying what we learn in our own career, we will begin to earn more green rather than becoming green - with envy.

Glenford Smith is a motivational speaker and personal achievement strategist.