My mother is trying my kids' patience

Q. My mother has decided to finally live with us to save money, and I was happy for this until my teenagers began complaining. My mom is an old nurse who is very structured. I am sort of relaxed with my children. Is it okay to have a family meeting and lay down some ground rules?

A. It is quite fine to be clear regarding your expectations. Remember, it is your house. Be patient with your mom. Remember she is adjusting to a new environment as well. Encourage your children to be patient with their grandmother.

Sister 'down-dressing' my daughter

Q. I have a problem with my sister and how she dresses and how she encourages my daughter, who boards with her, to dress skimpily. My daughter is 15 and I have been told that she sends her to the shop in short shorts. My sister helps financially, too, and can be arrogant. What do I do?

A. You will have to make a choice. Speak with your sister and ask her to help you to guide your daughter in positive ways. If she does not agree, you may have to make other plans regarding your daughter's living arrangements.

'Old-fashioned' or wise?

Q. I sent my son on vacation with his aunt, who allowed him to taste alcohol. He is 10. I spoke with her about it and she says I am too old-fashioned. Am I wrong?

A. You were certainly correct in making it clear that you do not agree with a child drinking alcohol. Speak with your son and ensure that he does not feel that he is to be blamed. Encourage him not to drink alcohol in the future.

Orlean Brown-Earle, PhD, is a child psychologist and family therapist. Dr Brown-Earle works with children with learning and behaviour problems throughout the island and in the Caribbean. Email questions to helpline@gleanerjm.com or send to Ask the Doc, c/o The Gleaner Company, 7 North Street, Kingston. Responses to concerns are to be considered as general, as cases shared with psychologists privately would be queried more deeply. Pray always!