Ban those 'sports'

As with every Olympics, whether summer or winter, I always question how and why some of the disciplines on show are included in a Games that should hold some level of sacredness.

There are a bunch of events that should not be in the Olympics. I've cussed about this before, but it looks like the list of dumb things is getting longer rather than shorter. I remember going ballistic over the announcement that trampolining is an Olympic sport. Mercifully, it has received the recognition it deserves; none! Now for the next games in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil, in 2016, two sports are making a reappearance.

Golf, which I admit is hard as hell to play professionally, and rugby (the seven-man team format) will be welcomed back into the Olympics. Why? I can only think about the influence of money (golf) and the International Olympic Committee's (IOC) pleasure in seeing grown men bash each other (rugby). But an Olympic sports? No.

The 'new' sport at Rio 2016 will be kiteboarding. I know what you're saying? What is that? Well, one dictionary definition is "the sport of riding on a small surfboard propelled across water by a large kite, to which the rider is harnessed." Now it's not to be confused with windsurfing where the 'sail' is attached to the surfboard. Ironically, windsurfing was dropped by the IOC to make room for kiteboarding. One and the same if you ask me.

But it gets worse. There's even talk about making pole dancing an Olympic sport. I'm not kidding. Apparently, there are competitive pole dancers in the world, and no I don't mean at strip clubs. And they believe that if certain other events are there, why shouldn't they. See my angst? That's what happens when "unnu mek anyting gwaan a Olympics"! Pole dancing? For those who like that kind of thing, good for them. But giving out medals for it on the international stage? Hell no! Imagine the interviews after the medal ceremony. Reporter: "So how does it feel to be a winner?" Competitor: "Oh it feels great. I'd just like to thank God, my parents and all the men at Murray's Hot Spot who always told me I could do it." Seriously people, do you really want to hear that?

Among the current events that need to go is the modern pentathlon. In that event, contestants do five things: pistol shooting, fencing, a 200-metre freestyle swim, showjumping, and a three kilometre cross-country run. How the hell is that one event? I can do eating, drinking beer, watching TV, surfing the web and sleeping all in one day but alas, no medal.

I'm telling you, we need to nip this thing in the bud before it gets any more out of hand. More time.

Tell me what events you would take out at daviot.kelly@gleanerjm.com