Like father, like son

1. Colleagues say the son is behaving just like his father did before him - always eyeing beautiful ladies. Some are fearful that he may even get a similar black-eye if he continues harassing the queen.

Plates for sale

2. Anything can be bought in Jamaica. This is a given. It seems that even licence plates are on offer as some people prefer easily memorised numbers. The motorist let the cat out of the bag when he visited a certain revenue office asking for the guy who had promised him a "good-up good-up" licence plate. Why doesn't he get a personalised plate, one person asked.

Where's the deal? Two weeks?

3. Did someone promise that there would be an IMF agreement in about two weeks? It won't take long, we were told. Now it seems things are not as easily accomplished once one gets on the inside.

Social butterfly ... broken pocket

4. Once more, the spouse has had to pay off debts incurred by the social butterfly. He was heard telling a friend that he was settling the score to save the family from embarrassment - after all, two visits from the bailiff in as many months would make them lose face in the neighbourhood.

Teaching politicians

5. Where do politicians go after defeat? To the university, of course, but to teach, not to be taught!