Q My children have become so smart where the computer is concerned, I feel bad when I ask them how to do things. How can I help myself?

A In many districts and towns across Jamaica there are computer stores and for a fee they will give you lessons on computer usage. Do not feel ashamed. What is important is that you learn as much as you can so you can help yourself and your children.

My daughter wants to live with me

Q My daughter's father has main care for her because of his financial means. I am not earning half his salary, so I chose to have her stay with him during the week where she has a helper and computers. She is now crying to live with me after three years of living with him. At 15, she said it is mostly her and the helper at home. Her father will not give me any money so she can live with me. What do I do?

A You can ask her father again if he will share the financial responsibilities so that your daughter can live with you. If not, you will have to explain to your daughter that you made a decision based on the fact that you wish for her to have a brighter future. Keep in touch with her daily and ensure that on weekends you spend most, if not all, of the time together.

Church wants to 'backbench me'

Q My church is having a one week set of meetings in December and they have asked my 10-year-old daughter to sing each night. It will be the week of her end-of-term exams and I told the church leaders that she will not be able to participate. We will also have to take the bus home late after the programme is finished each night. A sister told me that they want to 'backbench' me for that. Is there anything else that I can say to them to make them understand?

A You should request a meeting with the church leader and explain your situation. I think when you share with them your concerns, then they should understand your situation.

Orlean Brown-Earle, PhD, is a child psychologist and family therapist. Dr Brown-Earle works with children with learning and behaviour problems throughout the island and in the Caribbean. Email questions to helpline@gleanerjm.com or send to Ask the Doc, c/o The Gleaner Company, 7 North Street, Kingston. Responses to concerns are to be considered as general, as cases shared with psychologists privately would be queried more deeply. Pray always!