Nervous first meeting

Published: Wednesday | January 2, 2013 Comments 0

I am hoping to see my son soon. I have not seen him in 10 years as I had immigration problems and can travel now. He is 12 years old and even though I sent money through a third party, I have no pictures to see how he looks now. It is a long story. How can I approach our first meeting?

You can start by calling your son on the telephone and then use Skype or another type of technology, so you can see each other before meeting in person. Try your best to make your meetings positive. Ask your son a lot of questions about himself and answer his questions honestly.

My friend is very sick and will not share the extent of his illness with his spouse or teenage children. Is it okay if I speak to the hospital social worker and ask her to speak to him?

Yes, you can speak to the social worker who will guide you in the best way to approach this situation.

I get very upset when people do not follow protocol. I am tired of telling parents that when they cut lines or beg favours instead of being patient and waiting, their children learn these bad habits. When will this stop?

What is important is that you practice what you preach. If you are firm and ensure that your personal and business rules are respected, I am sure that others will follow suit. It begins with each one of us.

Orlean Brown-Earle, PhD, is a child psychologist and family therapist. Dr Brown-Earle works with children with learning and behavioural problems throughout the island and in the Caribbean. Email questions to or send to Ask the Doc, c/o The Gleaner Company, 7 North Street, Kingston. Responses to concerns are to be considered as general, as cases shared with psychologists privately would be queried more deeply. Pray always!

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