We do not like your new improvements.
Everything was going swimmingly along and now suddenly you have made it a pain to use our phones. A lady comes on and tells us a million unnecessary things - 'options' she calls them - and then proceeds to go into this diatribe of useless information to such a point that we have now forgotten who we are calling, or why.
Digicel is Jamaica's all-time favourite foreign company. You see, we have a weakness for the Irish, all of us being part Irish ourselves, and we are very disturbed and filled with unbelief that you could have changed a system that worked so well for these long speeches that do not even work because the lady says to me - 'option 93', press 7 (not 6 anymore), when you want to get rid of some message.
And when I do, there is a pause, as if she is thinking about it and she says: 'Message skipped', which I don't believe I even heard as an option, and then she waffles on again while we wait impatiently for our next message.
I would not write this letter if I was the only person newly disturbed and telling our friends to never, never leave us another message, but everyone I know is up in arms about your new improvement. Puts me in mind of when Coca-Cola decided to change its recipe.
I hope, like them, you will see the error of your ways and go back to the simpler version that you used to have and that we understood and liked.
Thank you for your consideration.