Family, friends and loved ones, we come today to bid farewell and lay to rest, the indicator light.
Like so many other things we used to hold dear, like manners, good etiquette and a stable Jamaican dollar, the indicator light has died, passed away to a peaceful rest somewhere in the auto afterlife. His demise seemed so sudden and yet, it was slowly building up. Some of his car-related cohorts have long since bid their farewell. The rule about pedestrians walking when the light is RED; the insistence that both hands be on the steering wheel while driving, and the mandatory wearing of seatbelts are but a few who disappeared into oblivion looong time ago. Alas, the bell has tolled for the indicator light.
I'm willing to bet money one day in the future, car companies, at least the ones in Jamaica, are simply going to remove the indicators from vehicles they sell because, quite frankly, 'nuhbaddy nah use dem! Travelling along nicely with a vehicle in front of you and then blap! The other driver pulls over with not even the slightest indication he/she was planning to do so. And if you have the time to 'ask' (or in my case 'cuss dawg rotten') the individual what that sudden move was all about? You are looked at like you're an alien from the deep reaches of space.
Or how about this scenario. An oncoming vehicle with two possible ways they can turn, but the driver gives you zero indication which way he's going. You have to wait because he has the right of way. All he has to do is give a simple flash of the indicator to let you know he's turning 'x' instead of 'y', especially if that allows you to move before he has to completely clear the tricky intersection. Simple stuff, but yet you're left sitting there, like a stooge, watching the world go by. Under the road code you have done the right thing (applaud yourself), the other driver hasn't (boos for them). But anyhow 'unnu did lik up, a woulda your fault! See how life unfair? (kisses teeth in utter disgust)
So dry your eyes, don't weep for the indicator light. He served well, and was a stalwart of the Jamaican road scene for years. But, apparently, seeing how little he was being used, his heart just gave out and he surrendered up the ghost with a loud "It is finished". I'm going to start breaking down in a minute if I continue. We will, of course, be taking up a collection at the funeral to assist the metal STOP sign, as he is on life support as we speak (sob).
Tell me the appropriate spot to bury our noble brother the indicator at email@example.com