What are some of the things that I should be working on to ensure that my teen and I have a good relationship?

Expect a shift in the parent-child relationship. As a teen, friends are going to become increasingly more important, simply because your child has more in common with them than with you. You will have to ensure that as you focus on your mid-career issues and marital concerns, that your child does not become left out. If you are going back to school, for example, ensure that you make time for spiritual and fun activities with your teen as you go about your busy day.

I don't want to raise another child

We have no grandchildren and, at 65, my husband wants to foster a child. I am 59. We are in good health and have the finances, but having grown one son who is now 35, I am tired. He would want to adopt a high-school child. How do I convince my husband that this is too much?

You can encourage your husband to become busy in volunteering at children's homes and children's programmes at church and in the community. Taking care of a teenager is a lot of responsibility. You may speak with a children's home and have a teenage child visit on weekends and holidays, and in this way, you can determine if this is a step you both really want to take.

What is my counsellor writing?

What type of information can my counsellor write in his or her files about me?

Your file at the counsellor's office should have identifying information such as your name, contact numbers, and address. It should also contain some assessment information such as your mental state, social and family history. A plan of how your treatment should occur should also be on your file. Case notes such as things you share or information about your situation may also be on your file.

Orlean Brown-Earle, PhD, is a child psychologist and family therapist. Dr Brown-Earle works with children with learning and behavioural problems throughout the island and in the Caribbean. Email questions to editor@gleanerjm.com or send to Ask the Doc, c/o The Gleaner Company, 7 North Street, Kingston. Responses to concerns are to be considered as general, as cases shared with psychologists privately would be queried more deeply. Pray always!