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University fi stone dog - seet deh!

Published:Sunday | August 24, 2014 | 8:00 AM

Carolyn Cooper, Contributor

  • CHAKA-CHAKA SPELLING

What a way time fly! Mi did write one column, 'University fi stone dog', weh Gleaner publish pon September 13, 2009. An nuff smaddy did bex wid mi, seh mi a tek liberty wid Hydel University College an di whole heap a odder 'university' dem all bout di place weh a gi out degree. See piece a weh mi did seh ya:

"So we have 'university fi stone dog', of all breeds and varieties. This biting saying denotes an excess of riches that results in wasteful behaviour, such as throwing valuable resources - instead of cheap stones - at dogs. Universities are now in such plentiful supply that we can afford to treat them lightly. Quantity is one thing. But what about quality?"

Story come to bump! See Gleaner big-big headline last week Wednesday: 'Degrees worthless - Graduates' patience wears thin as UCJ refuses to accredit Hydel programmes'. Seet deh now! It look like seh mi turn warner woman. But a no me a talk out di tings now. A Gleaner. An truth a truth.

See one next ting mi did seh: "Not every institution registered with the council claims the weighty name of 'university'. Most are colleges or institutes. And this is as it should be. The primary mark of distinction of a university is that it maintains a vibrant graduate-research programme. By contrast, a college specialises in undergraduate education."

DRAW BAD CARD

From what mi get fi understand, a 'university' put spokes inna Hydel wheel. It look like seh if dem tek out 'university' an lef so-so 'college', dem gone clear. Mi no know wa mek dem so hard-ears an nah tek telling. Old-time people seh, 'High seat kill Miss Thomas puss.' An it look like seh high name might-a kill Miss Bennett 'University College'.

All a wi want fi step up inna life. So mi do understand wa mek Miss Bennett set up university. Hydel got nursery, preschool, prep school, pre-first form, junior high, senior high, six form, special education centre, ketch-up reading centre, study centre an evening college. 'University college' a di next step. But Miss Bennett ha fi dweet right. Yu ha fi creep before yu walk

A di student dem mi sorry fa. How dem fi know seh big-big Hydel deh pon di low? When dem come a Ferry, an see how Hydel sprawl off, how dem coulda even tink seh di 'university college' no deh pan UCJ list? After dem pay school fee, dem cerfiticket naa no value? It can't carry dem nowhere? Dat no right. Dem draw bad card. Mi no know how dem an Miss Bennett a go work it out.

An a no Hydel one. Said same problem a Mico. Me want know wa UCJ a seh. Dem can't run couple ad, laka FSC, fi warn people bout di bogus degree dem weh no register? If a no UCJ, a who response fi sort out di 'university' lotto scam?

  • PRAPA-PRAPA SPELIN

Wat a wie taim flai! Mi did rait wan kalom, 'University fi stone dog', we Gleaner poblish pan Septemba 13, 2009. An nof smadi did beks wid mi, se mi a tek libati wid Hydel University College an di uol iip a ada 'yuunivorsiti' dem aal bout di plies we a gi out digrii.

Si piis a we mi did se ya:

"So we have 'university fi stone dog', of all breeds and varieties. This biting saying denotes an excess of riches that results in wasteful behaviour, such as throwing valuable resources - instead of cheap stones - at dogs. Universities are now in such plentiful supply that we can afford to treat them lightly. Quantity is one thing. But what about quality?"

Tuori kom tu bomp! Si Gleaner big-big edlain laas wiik Wenzde: 'Degrees worthless - Graduates' patience wears thin as UCJ refuses to accredit Hydel programmes'. Siit de nou! It luk laik se mi ton waana uman. Bot a no mi a taak out di tingz nou. A Gleaner. An chruut a chruut.

Si wan neks ting mi did se: "Not every institution registered with the council claims the weighty name of 'university'. Most are colleges or institutes. And this is as it should be. The primary mark of distinction of a university is that it maintains a vibrant graduate-research programme. By contrast, a college specialises in undergraduate education."

JRAA BAD KYAAD

Fram wat mi get fi andastan, a 'university' put spuoks ina Hydel wiil. It luk laik se if dem tek out 'university' an lef suo-so 'college', dem gaan klier. Mi no nuo wa mek dem so aad-iez an naa tek telin. Uol-taim piipl se, 'Ai siit kil Mis Tamas pus.' An it luk laik se ai niem maita kil Mis Bennett 'university college'.

Aal a wi waahn fi step op ina laif. So mi duu andastan wa mek Miss Bennett set op yuunivorsiti. Hydel gat norsri, prii-skuul, prep skuul, prii-fos faam, juunya ai, siinya ai, siks faam, speshal edikieshan senta, kech-up riidn senta, stodi senta an iivnin kalij. 'University College' a di neks step. Bot Mis Bennett a fi dwiit rait. Yu ha fi kriip bifuor yu waak.

A di styuudent dem mi sari fa. Ou dem fi nuo se big-big Hydel de pan di luo? Wen dem kom a Ferry, an si ou Hydel spraal aaf, ou dem kuda iivn tingk se di 'university college' no de pan UCJ lis? Aafta dem pie skuul fii, dem sorfitikit naa no valyu? It kyaahn kyari dem no-we? Dat no rait. Dem jraa bad kyaad. Mi no nuo ou dem an Mis Bennett a go work it out.

An a no Hydel wan. Sed siem prablem a Mico. Mii waan nuo wa UCJ a se. Dem kyaa ron kopl ad, laka FSC, fi waan piipl bout di buogos digrii dem we no rigista? If a no UCJ, a uu rispans fi saat out di 'yuunivorsiti' lato skyam?

Carolyn Cooper is a teacher of English language and literature. Visit her bilingual blog at http://carolynjoy-cooper.wordpress.com. Email feedback to columns@gleanerjm.com and karokupa@gmail.com.