Thu | Jan 24, 2019

Is it obeah?

Published:Tuesday | August 26, 2014 | 12:00 AM

Q: My husband and I have been happily married for 13 years. We have one son who was doing very well at school. My husband had a good job and it allowed me to stay home and care for him and our son. I quit my job at a senior level in a well-known company. Because of the job, sometimes he would sleep out. However, he started to stay out more nights per week, and a friend of mine told me he had another woman. I did not believe her and so she took me one early morning to witness both of them leaving her house and heading to work. My world came to a halt. I cried for days and was depressed. I had to get medical help. I packed his bags and told him to leave the matrimonial house. I felt like hurting him but I restrained myself. The hurt was compounded by the fact that he took the other woman to the house to help him move. I nearly damaged her too but I did not. I subsequently found out that she has three children and the last one is for my husband. A couple months later he telephoned me that he was doing it for the family. He was going to marry this older woman so that he could get his green card. He said he would eventually file for me and our son and have a better life. He said he could not leave me for a woman who has two other children with two other men. It has been three years now and no movement from him. He is still married and he is not supporting our son. My son wants nothing to do with him. Before he left they had an excellent relationship. My son adored him. My son is angry and no longer doing well in school. My son and other relatives are telling me to move on. I have not been on a date with anyone else since my husband left. Strangely, I am hoping that he will return but with each passing day it looks harder. Some people claim that the woman worked obeah on him and that is why he cannot leave. What should I do?

A: Your ex-husband is a heartless man. He has caused you and his son untold anguish. He is selfish and deceitful. While you thought he was at work he was in the bedroom with another woman. He was leading a double life and having a long-term relationship with another woman. You were living a comfortable life so there was no urgent need to migrate to seek a better life. In addition, he is in a better place and not helping. Obviously, he was justifying leaving you to marry this older woman.

He is s double-crosser. He is bad-mouthing this older woman because of her past sexual history which he has helped to create. He is despicable and he might just be telling this older woman some awful things about you. It is not obeah that is the problem but his greed and self-centredness.

It is clear that this man has no intention of returning to you. In any case, if he decides to return to you then you should run him. Do not allow him to divorce, then marry another woman and then divorce her and come back to you. You and your son need professional help. Please try and move on because there is no future with your ex-husband. Unless he thought he needed to take this older woman for protection then he is very wicked. Stay far from him and allow him to play a role in his son's life only.