Fri | Sep 21, 2018

Doctor's Advice: Teenager in love

Published:Saturday | February 14, 2015 | 12:00 AM

Q. Doc, I am a teenager (male) in love. I am planning to ask my girlfriend to marry me, but we have not had sex yet and we are hoping to start shortly. Can you help us?

There are certain things we do not know. First of all, Doc, does it hurt? Will it hurt either of us? I have heard rumours that 'first sex' can give a guy pain.

A. Well, I don't know how old you are, but the first thing I must do is to ask you not to rush into having sexual intercourse with your girlfriend. Teenagers are generally very fertile, so there is a high chance that sex with her will soon lead to the birth of a baby!

Now, whoever told you that 'first sex' was painful for guys is totally mistaken. In fact, it is rare for sex to cause a male any discomfort or pain at all. But the situation is a little different for young women. Often, they do feel a little bit of pain when they lose their virginity, especially if they are not relaxed. Don't misunderstand me, it is not a terrible pain, but it can make the occasion less than pleasant for the girl.

Why don't the two of you go and see a friendly doctor, and ask him to give you good advice about first sex? The doctor may well offer to prescribe some reliable contraception, such as the Mini-Pill or the Pill.

Also, he could maybe give your girlfriend an internal examination and make sure that everything is OK 'down there.' And if you ask him, he will give you some sensible advice about vaginal lubricants.

I hope your loving relationship goes well. Please try NOT to get this girl pregnant!

Q. I am 19 and have never been pregnant. Doc, would it be OK for me to use tampons?

A. Certainly. They are perfectly OK for women who have never been pregnant, but please always follow the hygiene instructions on the pack concerning such matters as washing your hands before handling the tampon.

Q. I am male, 22 years old and married, but I am having a BIG problem. My wife and I are trying to have a baby together, but I am concerned about my body. So I would like you to add your voice as to what I should do. You see, Doctor, I don't think I have gone through puberty. I haven't experienced any increase in penis size. My testicles are small, and I only have a little amount of pubic hair and little under my arms. I do have a lot of hair on my face, so I look as though I am mature, but I am not.

Doc, I wonder if something is wrong with my hormones like a lack of testosterone? Please give me your best advice.

A. I have slightly altered your personal details so that you will not be recognised. Sorry to hear about the problems you have been having.

Let me analyse your situation very simply:

If you are having sexual climaxes, during which you produce 'man fluid', then it is unlikely that you have much wrong with your hormones, but you could ask a doctor to arrange for a sample of your sex fluid to be checked by the lab in order to make sure that there is sperm in it;

If you are NOT having sexual climaxes, then it is likely that you have a hormone problem such as lack of testosterone, and you should therefore, ask a doctor to send a blood sample, which can be checked for hormone levels.

I hope this advice helps you and your wife. Please email me again when you have seen the doctor and have done tests.

Q. Last week, I had sex with a boy for the first time in my life. Frankly, doctor, it was rather dull!

My problem now is that I have intense pain when I pass urine, and I keep having to rush to the toilet to pass water.

What is wrong with me? Has losing my virginity given me some kind of VD?

A. That is unlikely. You almost certainly have Cystitis. That is an inflammation of the bladder, and it is extremely common in young women soon after they have sex for the first time.

Please ask your local pharmacy for a 'cystitis remedy' to take. But if the medication does not clear up your problem within a few days, you must see a doctor. Take with you a small specimen of your urine, preferably in a sterile container.

Q. Doc, I am a young man, and I haven't been circumcised. At first, it didn't bother me, but recently, we decided to start a family, and it was then I realised that my semen was having difficulty in 'exiting' through my foreskin.

How do I resolve this?

A. It does sound as though you may have a tight foreskin, especially if your urine is also having trouble getting through it. It may be that you need to have a circumcision operation. But what you should do now is consult a urologist (that is, a urological surgeon) to see if you really do have an over tight foreskin. It would help him to see what your foreskin does when your penis is erect. But as he cannot really examine you when you are erect, it would be a good idea to show him a PHOTO of your erection taken on your mobile phone. Good luck!

Q. Doc, I am female, 21 years of age. Two weeks back, I had real 'athletic' sex with a new guy. Since then, I have been losing little spots of blood from the vagina. Does this mean I have cancer, Doc?

A. No. The likeliest explanation is that the guy has caused a little cut inside your vagina. That is extremely common in young couples, especially if the guy is inexperienced. The spots of blood should go away in a couple of weeks, but if they don't, you should see a doctor and have him look inside.

In the meantime, no sex, please - until you have healed up.

Q. I suppose I am more interested in sex than most other guys of my age (which is 18). But recently I counted up and found that I was having around three orgasms for the week!

Will this do me any harm, Doctor?

A. No, it will not. In fact, your 'score' of three per week is only just above what the famous Dr Kinsey found to be the average for a guy of your age. So you can quit fretting.

Q. I am a female college student, and so far, I have had sex just four times. On NONE of these occasions did I orgasm, Doctor!

Am I abnormal?

A. Not at all. Most women do not climax during their early sexual experiences. For a female, it takes some time to learn how to 'discharge'. Also, it is necessary to have a thoughtful and experienced partner.