Wed | Nov 29, 2023

Rekindle positivity in your inner child

Published:Sunday | March 5, 2023 | 12:30 AM

Childhood is said to be the best time in anyone’s life. There are no responsibilities, no bills to pay, no deadlines to meet. On the other hand, childhood is a vulnerable and delicate phase of life in which whatever is said and done around them becomes the foundation of the child and stays with them for the rest of their lives.

In today’s competitive world, children are raised in a way that they are rewarded and showered with extra affection if they get good grades. However, if they are not performing well in school, they are compared with others and said to be a ‘disappointment’. It is important, therefore, to be cognisant to ensure that there are positive reinforcements from everyone around the child – from family, teachers, friends, and community. Hearing “we are proud of you” or “you are letting us down” is embedded in the child’s mind. Their actions are centred and influenced by these sentences. When they do not get approval or validation then they start to think that there is something wrong with them – a feeling of worthlessness sets in.

OTHERS’ OPINIONS

Our beliefs about ourselves are formed by others’ opinions from our childhood. Think back, and you will see that you gather, compile, and create your beliefs from what others spoke to you or about you. That tender stage of life doesn’t know how to challenge opinions or to question why such statements are directed towards them – they just accept.

We create beliefs based on opinions, hold on to them, and then start operating based on those beliefs, and tha i’s how it becomes a vicious cycle. Right from childhood, we work hard to meet others’ expectations to get validated. This pattern is emotionally addictive. From childhood, we start living for validations. The more compliments are showered, the more we want.

It is important to take responsibility for one’s actions – stop putting undue pressure on the child to perform to your expectations. Each child comes with their strengths and weaknesses. You should not try and force things upon them.

It is never too late for introspection and to change the course of your thoughts and actions. Just because it was reinforced by elders doesn’t mean it was the right thing to do. Tell your inner child to start believing in things that bring positivity and release those older, false beliefs.

Courtesy: Rajyoga Meditation Center, Kingston (meditation courses and counselling are offered free of charge). Email: kingston@jm.brahmakumaris.org. Or follow them on Instagram: rajyoga_meditation_jamaica