Tue | Jun 22, 2021

What is love?

Published:Monday | June 4, 2012 | 12:00 AM
Steve Lyston,

Steve Lyston, Contributor

One of the most misunderstood issues, highly misused word, affecting our society today is the expression - love.

A majority of the people in the world don't know what true love is. Many people try to find love in many different ways, only to be deceived or used.

Some express love through the giving of gifts alone, but they can never open their mouths to say 'I love you.' There are some women who from childhood, have settled for second best or anything that comes along because of the lack of love and affection shown to them by their parents, particularly by their fathers.

The end result is that they get badly hurt, because what they were experiencing was not love, it was in fact infatuation. As a result, they go forward making poor decisions such as:

Business prostitution - passing on information to the competition in exchange for money, sex and/or favours.

Personal prostitution - sleeping with someone in exchange for money, assets, or any other thing of value to you

Common-law relationships - living with someone without being married to them, while functioning as if married and engaging in all the activities of a married couple.

In common-law relationships, many women bear children for their live-in partners in the hope that this person will love and marry them; only to find out that their partner either has five or six other partners outside of that arrangement or that this person is married. Others know the situation but still settle for this kind of relationship.

Here are some questions for the ladies to think on:

  • If a person truly loves you, what would stop him from putting the ring on your finger? He must respect family and family values.
  • If he loves you, why can't he put your name on the bank account?
  • If he loves you, then why aren't you good enough to meet his friends and family? Why can't they know about you?

Some people express love by physical and verbal abuse of their partner. This is how they learnt it, so it is how they show it. Some women may say that their men beat them because they love them. Does that make sense to you?

Some people may say that they are loved by someone if that person agrees with them in all things at all times. But is it love when someone agrees with you when you are doing something wrong?

People will tell you that they love you, but as soon as something that seems to be a better opportunity presents itself then they are gone - without a thought for you. Is that love?

From time to time we will hear, 'If God loves you, why would He allow bad things to happen to you?' But bad things happen to good people too. Look at Job. Adversity comes for many reasons. Sometimes it happens to reveal what is inside of you to you. It can serve to teach and strengthen you.

When someone is deceived, somewhere along the line there were signs that something was not right, but the individual ignored or made excuses for these signs, and the end result is betrayal and deep hurt.

The human body is a God-given gift and must be respected by others and treasured by you. When someone chooses to date you, and tells you they need to ensure that you are the right one, so they have to test you out to make sure that they are not getting the proverbial 'puss in a bag', is that love?

A woman who has suffered rejection and has low self-esteem is easy prey for an experienced cheater. That is why such a person needs healing before they can make the right choice.

Some men may give women a lot of money as an expression of what they consider to be love, but is at its best an exchange of money for a good time.

True love is unconditional, everlasting, respectful, gracious, long-suffering, patient, kind and truthful. That being so, if a person has fallen out of love, it wasn't love in the first place. Who do you love?

Steve Lyston is a Biblical Economics Consultant and Author of several books, including 'End Time Finance' and 'The New Millionaire'.