Lady Saw: Baptism is no publicity stunt - Asks forgiveness from Tifa, Spice, Macka Diamond
Since my conversion to the Christian faith earlier this week, a lot of people have suggested that I'm not genuine. But I didn't make the decision. God did.
Some people are making negative arguments that I did it to steal the limelight of dancehall artiste J Capri, whose funeral was held on Monday.
I have realised that there's a place in Heaven for me, even though I have a past that was not clean, even though I was vulgar, even though I did bad things onstage.
It took me having to go to J Capri's funeral to become a Christian. I started conversing with God in the church. The Holy Ghost 'dash' it all over me. God did a transformation in my closet.
Heaven is rejoicing for me now that I've given my heart to God. J Capri and the angels are rejoicing. I care zero about my critics.
At one point, I thought Christ was finished with me. Some people are saying I was baptised before, so it's nothing new. But I was baptised as a child; it was my dad's choice. He baptised all his children. He was a Seventh-day Adventist. By the next week, we were backsliders.
A few years ago, God was doing things for me. I got in the Spirit in Florida. I was doing so well trying to change my lifestyle. Satan rose up on me, but I wasn't strong yet.
I went on Sting that year and called out another female deejay, and I behaved so badly. When I did it, I felt dirty within myself. The devil was smiling, but God wasn't so pleased with me.
But even in that state, I begged God, "Don't let go of me. Hold on to my skirt tail. Don't give up on me."
The night before I was baptised, I was drunk having spent time at Ribbiz. But I heard a voice say, "Marion, God is not pleased with you." Before I got saved, every morning I would call a guy I'm dating. I would smoke cigarettes all day.
At J Capri's funeral, the songs performed by Cherine Anderson and Alaine were songs that had taken me through the darkest of times in my life.
After the funeral, God said to me, "Go and get baptised." But I said, "Church lock. It's Monday. But I heard the voice saying, "Go now." I called my sister, and she ran and called a church sister. I told her I wanted a fiery church. The lady called the bishop. He said normally he would have been in Red Hills, but that day, he had stopped for something. God lined up everything for me."
God is in me. He is working on me. My salvation is not a joke thing. I thought my Lord had abandoned me because I had turned my back on him. Satan is vexed right now.
God said he would take care of me. God has found use for this broken vessel. I urge others to seek God and find him. Open up your voice to be vulnerable to him.
I have been through some things. I was raped in the ghetto. If I can use my story to stand firm, I will. I am already beaten, I am already battered, so others can't defeat me. I no longer need a man to comfort me. A cigarette cannot comfort me.
This is no publicity stunt. God used J Capri to win my soul. I want to win other souls for Him. I had nothing to do with my salvation. The spirit of God came and snatched me from the devil. Why would I want to walk away from all this money from stage shows? Why would I want to walk away from all the other shows that were pending, all the advance money?
God has told me that this project will be bigger than me. God shall make me win souls for Him. I am honoured to be part of God's flock. I used to be ashamed to say His name in the crowd. But now I am proud to call His name.
Two of my female rivals were at the funeral. God said I should forgive my rivals. I forgive them and ask for their forgiveness. I love you, Spice. I love you Macka Diamond. I love you, Tifa. Forgive me if I hurt you. I let go of any animosity. We artistes were fighting for Satan. We wanted his crown. But our real crown is in Heaven for us.
What I was doing was not of God. Forget the devil and work for Jesus. Please, don't take my joy, the joy that God has put inside me.
- Marion Hall, better known as Lady Saw, is a dancehall artiste. Email feedback to firstname.lastname@example.org.