Dear Doc: How do I avoid getting pregnant?

Doc, during my 20s, I did not have much sex except during a brief and disastrous marriage. But now, at the age of 30, I have met a wonderful man and sex is marvellous! I never knew it could be so good.

We plan to get married early next year, and I hope we will have children. But because of my job, I do not want to have a baby for maybe two years.

The problem is that, at the moment, we are having sex around four to five times for the week, but I do not really know anything about contraception, and neither does he. So we are relying on a mixture of 'rhythm' and 'withdrawal'.

Therefore, my question to you is, what is the best contraceptive method for a woman in my situation to use in order to get us through the next two years?

A: First of all, the current method you are using will result in pregnancy quite soon - especially as you are having sex so often.

Now people often ask me which is the 'best' method of contraception. In fact, there is no single 'best' method for everyone. The important thing is to find the one that best suits you (and your partner).

So here are some very good methods. The failure rate for these (i e the accidental pregnancy rate) are pretty low.

The Pill. This should be fairly safe for you to use, provided you have no 'risk factors' like smoking.

The male condom. Used by millions worldwide, provided it is aesthetically acceptable to you both, it could be a good choice.

The female condom (Femidom). A very acceptable alternative to the male condom, but tends to make 'crankily' noises. The outer ring of the Femidom tends to press on the clitoris, which some women appreciate.

The Mini-Pill. Milder than the Pill, because it contains only one hormone instead of two. You have to remember to take it at about the same time every day.

The Coil (IUD). Very effective, but does tend to make your cycle heavier and possibly more painful.

The Jab (the Shot). Extremely effective, but it can affect your cycle with excessive bleeding or missed periods.

The Patch (Evra). The skin patch is also very effective, but has the same sort of side effects as the Pill.

The Implant (Jadelle). Placed under the skin of the upper arm, it works very well. But when you want to have it removed, you must find a doctor who is skilled in removing it.

I am a 28-year-old man and I am still a virgin. However, I intend to put that right in 2014.

But an American friend told me that it is a good idea for a man in my position to get circumcised before attempting sex for the very first time. Is that true, doc?

A: No, it isn't. Some Americans are quite irrationally in favour of circumcision, so don't listen to your friend.

There is absolutely no reason why you should get circumcised before having your first sexual experience.

Our doctor wants to insert some kind of special coil, called a Mirena, to help my heavy periods.

But would it work, Doc?

A: It should. Mirena is like the ordinary contraceptive coil in structure, but it contains a 'reservoir' of a hormone. This spreads into the womb and helps to reduce the menstrual blood flow.

Possible side effects (which are not common), include headache, migraine, and back pain.

My husband tells me that a few months ago, he picked up gonorrhoea while away on a business trip. This has been quite a shock!

He says that I should now have tests from a doctor. But is that really necessary? After all, I have no symptoms.

A: What many people do not realise is that when a woman contracts gonorrhoea ('the clap'), there are usually no symptoms. So most women get infected but does not realise that they have the disease. It may be years before they start getting any pain. It can sometimes make them infertile.

If your husband had sex with you after he had contracted it, the probability is that you may have contracted the virus from him.

Therefore, it is absolutely essential that you go to a doctor or a clinic where they can do tests, and then give you treatment. Please do not have sex till both you and your husband have been pronounced 'completely cured'.

It will not be easy to rebuild your marriage after this unfortunate occurrence, but I wish you luck in doing so.

I am a 36-year-old man and I feel that my virility has faded in the last few years.

Would it help me to go on testosterone?

A: Well, there is a slow decline in men's testosterone output from their teenage years as they get older. I think it is unlikely that your present testosterone levels are low, considering that you are only 36.

But it would not harm you to have your testosterone level checked if you can afford it. Please do not start taking testosterone unless you have had a test result that definitely shows your levels are low.

I was unfaithful to my husband in October. It happened just once and I can assure you it will not occur again!

However, I am now pregnant. Naturally, I am worried about whether this baby is my husband's or my one-night lover's.

I did have a period at the beginning of October.

A: Well, if you are right about that and you did have your cycle after your 'fling', then it is virtually certain that this baby is your husband's. So I do not think you have any reason to worry.

My wife's vagina has definitely increased in size after the birth of our third baby.

Would it be possible for her to take an operation to tighten up, Doc?

A: Yes, it would, if your wife genuinely wants to do that. Pelvic floor exercises (carried out over six months or so) would also help.

This is a common problem among women who have had children. As a temporary measure, I recommend having a small vibrator in the vagina during lovemaking. That makes everything feel much tighter for both partners.