Oran Hall | Shaping the money behaviours of children

Although much has changed as many households now rely on dual incomes, the traditional model of fathers being the primary source of household income has not died.

But fathers are more than providers. Theirs is the critical role of shaping the financial behaviours and values of their children, who later transmit them to their own children.

Fathers shape the financial behaviours and attitudes of their children by being their role models – in working smartly and honestly, saving, spending, investing, and planning well. Because children tend to emulate what they see their parents do, it is important that fathers budget wisely, use debt responsibly, honour their financial commitments, and practise good financial management overall.

Fathers mould the financial beings of their children by being their primary source of counsel and advice but can only do so effectively if they live what they preach. In 2019, Leading Tree published the findings of a survey that it commissioned. Of the 1,000 people surveyed in the United States, 43 per cent said they went to their fathers for financial guidance, and 56 per cent said their fathers helped them develop good money habits in their growing-up years. Their fathers were very influential in the significant decisions – buying a house, buying a car, planning for retirement, investing, getting a credit card, and last but by no means least, budgeting.

Sometimes the advice is not always easy to swallow. Just today, a father shared with me that his son discussed buying a car with him. He said he advised him against taking the route he was considering. The son thought otherwise. He followed his own way and is now ruing his decision. Of course, daddy must now advise on how he can resolve his problem.

Another friend told me how his eldest son changed his mind about buying a car after he sat with him and pencilled the expenses that inevitably come with owning a motor car. Many children clearly see their fathers as financial mentors, especially when they make themselves accessible and are present in their lives in tangible ways.

Fathers can help shape the financial lives of their children – especially their sons – by being providers. By making it a priority to take care of the needs of the family, fathers can inculcate in their children what it means to be responsible and to care for the well-being of those in their care.

Allowing children to participate in financial matters is a very practical way to school them in the art of good decision-making. For example, fathers can schedule family meetings to discuss family finances, among other matters, and let the children participate. Taking them along when shopping can also give them good insights into how to spend sensibly, which means that fathers must first be able to shop well.

Fathers can help their children develop good financial skills through education. They can read, watch, and listen to financial programmes offered by the media – at no cost. They can attend community-sponsored and church-sponsored financial-literacy programmes with them and play games that teach about money with them.

Fathers should make themselves so open to their children that they feel comfortable to ask meaningful financial questions; they should take advantage of teachable moments to impart financial wisdom and demonstrate good financial decision-making in real life and in real time.

The lessons children learn from their fathers won’t go away readily. Their behaviours become more set as their experiences increase and as they see consistency between what their fathers tell them and what they show them through practice.

The structure of our society is so complex, it is challenging to prescribe solutions that work well across the board. Women head a significant proportion of Jamaican households, and men head some households that have no adult female. There are households in which the adults have just visiting relationships. Some parents live abroad, and some have multiple partners. In others, there are secret partners and secret children, too. Not to mention that some fathers do not work and others are not inclined to. How, then, can fathers play a meaningful role in helping their children develop positive financial behaviours?

In some cases, fathers need a re-set, a re-make even. Perhaps we need to take more seriously the traditional view of fathers being the ‘breadwinner’ responsible for providing for the well-being of the family – however they define it – and regardless of the financial capabilities of the mothers of their children. The extent to which Father’s Day is happy today could, in many cases, signal whether our fathers need a re-set.

Oran A. Hall, author of Understanding Investments and principal author of The Handbook of Personal Financial Planning, offers personal financial planning advice and counsel.finviser.jm@gmail.com