From silence to song

Jhoe Speng has always loved music. Raised in a family that prioritised creative expression, nothing surpassed Speng’s love for music except his love for his twin brother. When the pair started their journey to become recording artistes, it was his brother Sanjay’s determination to succeed that pushed them. So when Sanjay died unexpectedly of a brain tumour in 2021, Speng found that the once robust symphony inside his head became deafeningly silent.

Speng, born Sanjoe Spencer, came into the world on February 13, 1996. His brother, Sanjay Spencer, arrived mere minutes before him. As identical twins, they had a strong bond from the beginning.

Their childhood home was a place of joy and creative expression. Though, as a youth, Speng enjoyed visual arts, photography, and other creative pursuits, music was his first love. “My stepdad, him inah music, too. So I feel like that’s where the influence come from, where we get fi listen to some legends who did it before us and a dem we emulate and take from,” Speng explained.

Regardless of the passion for music, it never occurred to him to pursue the art as a career. “Mi always love business. Mi love money, and me love hustle. But my brother, my twin Jaii, he was really the one who loved music [more]. He was the one who did wah fi be an artiste. Me used to tell him say, me a go be your producer and write the song dem fi him. A him did have the courage fi go in front of a crowd and say ‘Yow, listen to this’ and deejay. Until me realise say if me do it with him, it will sound better cause me a give him some harmonies. We realise seh we can really do this thing together.”

Thus began their journey into the industry. The two frequented open-mic nights and took every opportunity to showcase their diverse musical interests. “We did a lot of stuff together. We explored a lot of sounds: dancehall, Afrobeats, likkle souls, everything. We do everything weh we coulda do, all remix.” The pair even got a co-sign from the Gargamel himself, Buju Banton, during a private studio session with him.

While building the foundations for their music career, Sanjay was privately suffering from intense headaches. In August 2021, during what was a no-movement day, when all citizens were required to stay indoors to curb the spread of COVID-19, Speng got a call from his mother to take his twin to the hospital. At the hospital, doctors discovered that Sanjay had an undiagnosed brain tumour.

“At that time, for me, a whole heap a things a gwaan ina my head. Me literally a see with my two eye dem say we a lose this youth,” he recalled. He says it was when he saw the nurse conduct a pupillary light reflex assessment that his brother failed that he realised he might be dying. He was pronounced dead later that night.

“With him passing, all of us did devastated, especially me. I couldn’t write any more. Some people say a writer’s block, but for me, it never feel the same. And me never reach a one place of acceptance fi say Jaii deh here in the spirit so mek me continue do this. Me still never reach desso yet, so a it this for music.

“What brought me back was a song that me and him did together.”

After years of ignoring his talent, Speng rediscovered a song the two had started working on together. Listening to the melodies that they had come up with in their more joyful moments inspired him to finish the song. It became his first single, Better Place.

He said the song and the music video, which was filmed at a candlelight ceremony for Sanjay, were integral for him to turn the page on his grief.

Now, five years after his passing, Speng says he is ready to start honouring his brother’s legacy through music.

“My duty is fi stain this place with fi him legacy,” he professed. As the young artiste works on his first EP, which will delve into his grief and gratitude for where he is now, he says he is in a better place.

“I am in a better place right now, too. A lot of people don’t know me outside of music. They don’t know the energetic side, the fun side. So we a go try showcase that.”

shanel.lemmie@gleanerjm.com