Eric Higgins is model father of the year

Paul H. Williams, Gleaner Writer

Fathers Incorporated is an organisation set up to project a positive image of fatherhood and to help Jamaican men become better fathers. Over the years, it has embarked upon a series of activities to help achieve its objectives. The Model Father Award competition is one of its major projects.

The competition is open to all fathers, and members of the public are invited to nominate that special man who best represents the ideal of what a strong, dedicated and loving father should be. Nominees are judged on the following criteria: supportive and nurturing role in the home; involvement in children's/child's education; community involvement and on how much of a role model they are for others.

At the end of this year's judging, Horace Grandison, 48, of Bethany, Alexandra, St Ann, and 71-year-old Sedley Gibson, of Rockhall, Portland, made it to the top five. Dennis Blair, 62, of Grange Hill, Westmoreland, is the second runner-up, with the first runner-up being Leon Fraser, 44, hailing from Whitewater Meadows, St Catherine.

While the attributes of the afore-mentioned fathers are quite laudable, it is those of 42-year-old Eric A. Higgins, of Greater Portmore, St Catherine, that are most impressive, and, as such, he was presented with the winner's trophy and other prizes at a special ceremony on June 16, in the presence of his wife and two sons, Chevaughn, 19, an anthropology student at the University of the West Indies, and 15-year-old Jamaica College student Tajnic, who both wrote the winning essay about their father.

Driving force

Here is some of what they had written glowingly of Eric Higgins:

"I (Chevaughn) think that my father is special. I cannot remember a person in my life that had a more significant influence on me than my father. My father has been the driving force behind my academic achievements. He loves easily; he is kind, and he listens, suggests and defends. Throughout my life, my father has been responsible, caring, strict in his guidelines, and yet understanding of the difficulty of being a teen and a young adult. This behaviour has allowed us to grow and expand our future possibilities.

"What makes our father a great father is that he puts our interests first, always, protecting us, playing with us, teaching us about self-esteem and being a good disciplinarian. He strongly disapproves of our actions that he sees as wrong, using tough love to prove a point. He does this through the power of his words, not his fists. Likewise, he doesn't reward us for actions that are expected, such as helping with house chores or performing well in school. He acknowledges that we are human, and that making mistakes is part of growing up. However, he makes it clear that repeated irresponsibility won't be tolerated.

"He teaches us to appreciate things; he almost never let us take what we have for granted. From the food on the table (that he prepares) to the good education we are receiving, he will make us see the value in everything we have. And most of all, he doesn't let us treat him like an ATM.

"He spends quality time with us and has mastered how to have fun with us, attending our matches. He takes the time to listen to us and have a good, easy chat with us. He also makes time to help us with our homework, every day, if necessary. He leads by example; he is above the old "do as I say, not as I do" saying.

"Our father is also very active in our community. Even though we are no longer at prep school, he still volunteers his time to the football and track teams. They can count on him to be there, managing the team, taking care of the children and cheering them on just like he did for us when we were playing.

"With his training in psychology (BSc), more and more persons are also calling on him for guidance. He is always ready and willing to help in whatever way he can. We firmly belief that our father is a positive role model for others.

"When our aunt fell on hard times, our father adopted his nephew and treated him as his own son. He now calls him daddy and refers to him as his real dad. That is the kind of love and nurturing that our father has, not just for us, but for all. Our father also illustrates the importance of affection by professing his love for our mother in front of us. In all, he adheres to the values he'd like us to follow."

Eric's model father status is hardly surprising when you reflect on his own upbringing. He's the third of five children for Dermot Higgins and Beatrice Drummond. Because of the absence of his father, who worked overseas, he was closely attached to his mother. They lived in an east Kingston community, which, he believed, forced his mother "to demonstrate an authoritative parenting style".

"This was evident in the ways in which we were socialised. A great deal was demanded from us and high standards were set for all. Her disciplinary methods were indeed supportive, in that, she would always try to explain the situation in a way that we could see the consequences that could result," he said.

Of his father he had this to say: "Try not to break his laws. Although I was always happy to see him and eagerly awaited his visits, there was always a bit of fear lying within me towards my father. However, the house always felt like a safer place when he was around."

From that family support, high expectations and sense of being safe, Eric has come to subscribe to the notions of togetherness, trust and peace. "I have learnt from a very early age that with hard work and dedication you can achieve your goals in life and that a man should support his family, not just monetarily, but by being there for his children and spouse," he said.

And that seems to be just what he's doing, for his wife Janette said, "Eric is a practical and loveable person, and displays the following qualities: ability to accept mistakes of others in the home, ability to correct and not to accuse, ability to love and care, in spite of, and most of all, he is dependable and a man of integrity. Psalms 112 can also be used to describe Eric Higgins."

Pastor Berlin Matthews, of Fellowship Apostolic Church, in Old Braeton, St Catherine, and one of Eric's referees, agrees, as he said, inter alia, "From Morant Point in the east to Negril Point in the west, without question, this father is among the best. North to south, there is no doubt. Epitomising a godly father is what he is about ... . To Eric Higgins belong these accolades: stern disciplinarian, humble and true. With heartfelt gratitude we all thank God for you. We salute you."

paul.williams@gleanerjm.com