The true foundation of love

As Valentine’s week begins, markets bloom with red roses, chocolates, teddy bears, and countless gifts meant to express love. For some, this week marks a fresh beginning. For others, it brings closure, and for many, it is simply a continuation of an existing bond.

Interestingly, earlier generations had fewer ways to openly express love, yet relationships seemed to last longer. Today, despite greater freedom and expression, we see more heartbreaks, emotional anxiety, and confusion in relationships.

This raises an important question: What has changed within us? Why do relationships today struggle to sustain harmony? Why is there tension even in our closest bonds, and why do we increasingly rely on counsellors to keep relationships alive? Something essential is missing.

GROWING FRAGILITY OF MODERN RELATIONSHIPS

One major reason relationships fail is not lack of love but lack of individual stability. Many connections today are built on emotional dependency rather than emotional strength. We often expect our partner to fill our inner emptiness, give constant validation, appreciation, attention, and reassurance. When expectations remain unmet, disappointment and conflict follow.

When there is inner chaos, understanding another person becomes difficult. Managing one’s own emotional turbulence already feels overwhelming, so accepting another person’s differences, opinions, or moods feels like extra effort. Slowly, love turns into pressure, and connection turns into conflict.

PEACE: THE MOTHER OF LOVE

Peace is the womb where love is nurtured. If an individual is unsettled within, love becomes a disguised form of seeking. Seeking approval, worth, or security from another eventually drains the sweetness of any relationship. Love then becomes conditional and fragile.

However, when one is grounded within the self, there is self-assurance, self-respect, and emotional stability. One appreciates personal efforts, accepts mistakes without criticism, and feels complete within. From this space, love is born. Peace within creates readiness for love, not dependency disguised as affection.

FROM EMPTINESS TO WHOLENESS

Genuine love can’t be shared if there is no peace within oneself. When you are comfortable being alone, without distractions or negative self-talk, you cultivate inner peace that is independent and unconditional. From such wholeness, love flows naturally. It does not demand, cling, or control. It understands, accepts, and gives space. This is love without masks.

This Valentine’s, don’t just check how much love you receive. Pause and ask: ‘How peaceful am I with myself?’ If peace is missing, relationships unknowingly become a means of seeking. Love should not turn us into emotional beggars. We need to stop running from ourselves in the name of love.

The mantra for life is simple: peace when alone, share love when around people. Prioritize inner peace first, and let love flow through you effortlessly – pure, grounded, and unconditional.

Courtesy: Rajyoga Meditation Centre, Kingston (meditation courses and counselling are offered free of charge). Get in touch via email: bkmeditation.jam@gmail.com or WhatsApp: 876-853-7848. Follow them on Instagram: rajyoga_meditation_jamaica